I’m Sure Rob Kardashian Is Just At Blac Chyna’s House To Eat Her Food

“Guys, don’t tell my sisters you saw me carrying this box of doughnuts into Blac Chyna’s house.”
“Normally we wouldn’t care, but that’s the sixth one this morning-“
“DON’T TELL MY SISTERS!”

Well, here we are again, gang. Another day another mistake for Rob “Blob” Kardashian. It seems like the fattest, brokest Kardashian is getting back together with that one stripper that keeps telling him he can get one more song at half price (read: leniency on child support) and he’s taken the bait once again. Seems like only yesterday that Blac Chyna was attempting to buy the rights to her own fake Kardashian name, only to be out-assed by the biggest in the business.

TMZ reports that the two are somehow sleeping together (The Superficial dirt team went above and beyond to uncover this black market sex tape). Supposedly Blac Chyna has been holding Rob captive since the start of last weekend and demanding E! to greenlight their reality TV show as ransom and distracting Rob with Dodgers gear because he’s a child who probably still collects baseball cards. From TMZ:

We’ve found out Rob’s been there every day and every night… going on a week. They’ve been socializing with friends and family with BBQ’s and a pool party, and they’ve taken hikes together. Chyna dropped a ton of cash on gifts for Father’s Day, including a Louis Vuitton bag, a customized Dodgers hat, sneakers and white and blue roses emblazoned with an “R.” We’re told this has nothing to do with a TV show or business…

“Nothing to do with a TV show or business…”

Right… Blac Chyna doesn’t need the extra cash considering her newfound success as an action movie star…

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Tune in next time when paps catch Rob sitting in the driveway crying because Blac Chyna snapped his Xbox in half with her buttcheeks.