Rihanna’s access to jewelry suggests engagement

January 5th, 2009 // 42 Comments

Rihanna has been spotted recently wearing an insane diamond ring (above) sparking all kinds of speculation that she’s engaged to long-time boyfriend Chris Brown. Here’s a little theory I cooked up: SHE’S FILTHY RICH. That said, I included pics of Rihanna performing at the B96 Jingle Bash in Chicago, so you can formulate your own scientific evaluation using the most pertinent leather-clad facts. Nobel prize committee, I’ll be awaiting your call.

Photos: WENN

  1. kara

    so uh, first?
    but yeah i don’t think shes engaged i think she just bought that. heck, shes so young. i just don’t see it yet.

  2. hellz yeah she is

  3. mink

    she looks like a fetus

  4. Rawr

    I’d wreck that chick, or try to anyways!

  5. Josecilla Jo

    She is amazing , what a lovely couple!

  6. Massa'

    why are we looking at this porch monkey? You can dress up a turd as much as you like, but when you get right down to it, she still has steel wool pubes and her coochie smells like hot-dog water, just like all coons. Although when they finally bring back slavery, I got dibs on her, I’ll need someone to lick my ass clean after I take my morning shit. She’d be good at licking shit. Plus, if she got some shit on her face, you wouldn’t notice it. I think I’ll name her Starsheema, after Starsheema Bobbatoom, who played a slave woman in that comedy from the 70′s “Roots”……See, I’d be a good slave owner.

  7. jelaime

    shes a great performer, yo.

    and chris brown is very good-looking!

  8. Bickus Dickus

    ……that comedy from the 70′s “Roots”……


  9. #6 & #8 have Black bosses at their Sonic burger joint jobs. And they’re being sexually harassed by them as well.

  10. Puh leeze, who wouldnt splatter on that gorgeous forehead…as long as theres on attitude im there…

  11. Massa'

    Alot of Blacks eat at Sonic burger, mostly because Sonic’s are located in inner city areas, where White people don’t go anymore because every inner city in every urban setting in America has been completely decimated and overran by porch monkey’s. Which is why Sonic launched it’s newest promotional items, the “Sickle Cell” burger and the “Obomma Burger”. The Sickle Cell burger has extra onions shaped like tiny sickle cells, and Sonic actually pays you to order the Obomma Burger, in honor of the pres elect, who bought his election by promising all the coons he was gonna send them another welfare check. Plus, Sonic is reducing it’s soft drink selection to one, Grape Soda, since they never sold any other flavors anyway.

  12. SueMe

    Happy to see a brand new year.

  13. abbri

    I just saw her ad on ‘million aire friends. com’. just decided to meet somebody online. It is said she is dating a great guy that she is meeting there.

  14. The Laughing G-D

    Good lord that fellow is slightly racist, I should unmake him… I’ll save it for when he dies a terrible death. Why punish today what you can punish eternally, I always say. Side, he’ll feel right at home with other “free thinkers” who have come before him. Come on down and join the party!!

  15. Massa'

    Ok..ok..I appologize for coming on here acting like a total ass. I’m just upset because I’ve been on my job for like FOREVER and I work hard just like everyone else…then when this big promotion comes up, my boss (Mr. Asshole), gives it to a BLACK guy instead of ME, all because the dude had a college education and yeah ok I admit..a little more qualifications then I did…I’m gonna go kill myself now…but not before I get fucked up the ass AGAIN..by a black person :)

  16. #15 – That’s too bad… it must suck to fart silently. I mean, what’s the fun in that?

  17. Ted from St Pete

    She has nice tits, but she looks too much like the Prince formally known as the symbol for my tastes.

  18. tp

    Ugliest Chick Alive

  19. SueMe's Trainer (speciman # 7654F - Berkley Primate Center)

    Happy New Year SueMe! As for the rest of you…die!

  20. NTS

    Does no one see the matching bracelet on her right hand? It is clearly fashion jewelry. When did guys start giving away engagement rings with matching bracelets? Not likely to be an engagement ring…SORRY!

  21. Ballack Obomma

    After I take office, I promise to make Rhianna stop “whitening”….also, I’m gonna bring Marvin Gaye back to life, and you’ll all get a new Marvin CD in the mail with your gov’t checks. Thanks again for voting for me White People, and really, you’ll get your bribery check as promised, right after I summon Marvin from the dead. And also, to that black lady in Florida, you’re right sista’, you won’t have to worry about paying your mortgage or putting gas in your car after I take office, I swear. And don’t forget to check your mailbox daily for your rent, gas, and vote checks….

  22. RP’S GHOST! Dude, how you bean? I haven’t been on in fucking months and you show up to haunt the place?

  23. Massa'

    Here’s a good exchange, it takes place right after slavery is brought back and I have taken possession of Rhianna and Biraq Obomma as my house slaves:

    Rhianna: “Massa! Massa! there’s dirt in my bowl.”

    Massa’: “Sorry slave, I forgot to add the water. Now what’s your name slave?”

    Rhianna: “It’s Rhianna…”

    Massa: “Wrong, it’s Starsheema Bobbatoon, now get it straight slave”

    Starsheema: “Yes massa!”

    Biraq Obomma: “Massa, I keep trying to tell you that I’m white. My mother was a white woman, really….I’m not black”

    Massa: “Wrong Toby, here’s a video clip of you being praised by Farakhan, Jesse, and Rev Wright as the black messiah, and you standing beside them….so what do you have to say for yourself, Toby”

    Toby: “That was just so the ignorant black people in this country would vote for me based solely on my skin color, and so that all the self-loathing guilt-ridden pc commie liberal treehugging white misenthropes would vote for me too…..but really, I’m white”

    Massa’: “You have a wonderful sense of humor Toby, now go fetch your wife, my toilet needs licked clean again.”

  24. Herr Weiss

    Massa, it’s good to know there are politically correct thinkers left in this dying nation of ours. We just need enough to overcome the rotten liberals that have ruined it. God bless you sir.

  25. lola richie

    She has a very unique look. Could go either way. It is a distraction from the war and corporate corruption

  26. supersex

    she way to manly looking, i’d rather fuck massa’ mother in the ass then have her lick my dick clean!!!

  27. Fashion?!

    Those gloves have got to be the most impractical things to wear ever.

  28. Happy New Year to you too Trainer…Im flattered.

  29. Happy New Year to you too Trainer…Im flattered.

  30. testing

    whatever she cant sing or dance why do we need her?

    #11 You are an idiot, Sonic is white trash food not black people food, look at their restaurant locations all white hick areas

  31. Smart&Cute2Boot

    Does she look like Prince to anyone else?

  32. bootlips

    She still has simian features.

  33. Yes #31 she does resemble prince in this pic, but Prince is so feminine allthough very handsome.

  34. Yes #31 she does resemble prince in this pic, but Prince is so feminine allthough very handsome.

  35. Boooo

    That’s a wig.

  36. Ms.Whiplash

    They make a pretty hot couple. I love how she’s grabbing his shirt in that one picture, and how they’re looking at each other….good chemistry!

  37. shimmy

    Engaged to Rihanna? Hmmm.

    She has a pretty good body; that’s about it. Pity about the face. She looks like a pug. Beastiality aint the coolest.

    And that voice of hers. Man. Whiny, nasally, and constipated, three in one. Imagine listening to that 24/7.

    Poor Chrissy Brown.

  38. #22 – TG! I have come back to haunt this blog with clever musings and general idiocy. I other words, nothing’s changed… except for the whole me being a ghost thing…


  40. I like prima-gold verymuch because it’s very beauty

  41. I like prima-gold verymuch because it’s very beauty

  42. Nice little fellow that God is racist, I should break … For it when he dies a horrible death I’ll save. Why penalize this sentence you can always, I always say. Side, the other “free” thinkers who have come before him feel right at home with. Come down and join the party!

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