Rihanna’s Talking About Chris Brown

March 30th, 2011 // 87 Comments

Rihanna appears on the cover of Rolling Stone where she opens up about Chris Brown and sets the record straight on cutting him some slack via the restraining order and is surprisingly gracious about the whole thing without entirely letting him off the hook. Except don’t ask him about it or else you’re a “hater” trying to stop him from finding Jesus in his moonwalks or whatever the fuck Russell Simmons was saying through pancake metaphors. Anyway, here’s Rihanna talking about Chris and how insanely horny she is:

On easing the restraining order:
“That’s my decision. It doesn’t mean we’re gonna make up, or even talk again. It just means I didn’t want to object to the judge… [Chris Brown and I] don’t have to talk again ever in my life. I just didn’t want to make it more difficult for him professionally. What he did to me was a personal thing – it had nothing to do with his career. Saying he has to be a hundred feet away from me, he can’t perform at awards shows – that definitely made it difficult for him. That was the only thing it was going to change, so I didn’t care. But you can never please people. One minute I’m being too hard, and the next minute I’m a fool because I’m not being hard enough.”

On not being with anyone since breaking up with Matt Kemp in December:
“I’m not dating. I’m not sexing, I’m not even sexting. It’s on complete nil… You think you’re disappointed? Try being in this body… When you’re not with the person you want to be intimate with, a picture is the next best thing. Well, Skype is safer. But a picture lasts a long time. When you’re alone, and those horny moments come up, pictures can be very handy… I haven’t gotten a dick picture in a long time. I think people are a little afraid. It can turn out bad.”

On being into S&M:
“I like to be spanked. Being tied up is fun. I like to keep it spontaneous. Sometimes whips and chains can be overly planned – you gotta stop, get the whip from the drawer downstairs… I’d rather have him use his hands… I do think I’m a bit of a masochist. It’s not something I’m proud of, and it’s not something I noticed until recently. I think it’s common for people who witness abuse in their household. They can never smell how beautiful a rose is unless they get pricked by a thorn.”

Of course that last quote is going to send every Chris Brown fan and Internet badass into a tizzy because if you haven’t followed the numerous threads here in the past few weeks, liking rough sex is an excuse to beat a woman’s face in and leave her for dead to these idiots. I mean, clearly it’s the same thing, isn’t it? “Nuance? What’s a nuance?” So, tell you what, why don’t you attempt that on the next person stupid enough to have sex with you (I’m being generous here.) and let us all know how it goes? “Well, she asked to be spanked mid-coitus, so I punched her repeatedly in the face instead. Turns out they arrest you for that and classify it as assault. I honestly had no clue, which might explain why I swallowed a nickel this morning. Get this: They’re not candy. My entire world is spinning out of control…”

Photos: WENN

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  1. mamamiasweetpeaches

    “I Dont Like Being Beat Up…But Whips And Chains Excite Me” – RIHANNA

    • Snooki's Taint

      it is probably too late for this advice, but … ‘dont’ be an idiot’.

    • missloopy

      there is a significant difference between consensual rough sex (where partners are respectful of boundaries) & being a punching bag for some douche who can’t act like a real man.

    • Dan

      A little roughness during sex and biting someone’s face are two entirely different things. Sometimes it is nice to feel a sense of powerlessness and give someone else control for awhile. Takes all the pressure off for a time and is like a mini break from responsibility.

      That doesn’t mean you want scars afterwards.

    • Reece

      Most ppl enjoy sex but dont want a hobo jizzing on them…Or to be a little more extreme, if a girl has had sex before, is it not possible for her to be raped?…is that just as hard for you to understand? Idiot.

      • There are times during sex that hair pulling and rough spanking is great and necessary, other times it’s like “Ow! I just wanna cuddle!” Lol,
        There are times during a relationship were people like to press peoples buttons, I am opening myself up to hate right now, but I’ve been slapped a couple times.. I enjoyed it, but I am a freak like that. No, never been punched or bitten or left marks besides bruises from getting too rough. So I sooo see what Rihanna is talking about, the fantasy part about it at least. If you are scared of your man, that is a different story.
        -Back to class.
        :)

  2. Snooki's Taint

    I’m sorry, did she say something? Her shorts got in the way.

  3. stevebeagle

    zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  4. Rihanna Rolling Stone
    Randolph Duke
    Commented on this photo:

    it’s the dude from the “Mask” movie going black face…

  5. Bob

    *Inserst Sideshow bob joke*

  6. mememe

    Dat ass.

  7. My Name Peggy

    Poor Rihanna, we should all be sending her dick pictures.

  8. *Almost* made it to lunchtime without a Brown post. But that hasn’t happened in well over a week

  9. Drew

    Oh I get it, he punched her thinking he might get his dick sucked after. Swing and a miss I guess (no pun intended).

  10. HackSaw

    I’d hit it and she would like it.

  11. Cock Dr

    Nippidee-doo-da, nippi-dee-yay.
    That woman needs a boyfriend.
    Certainly there’s gotta be some nice, even tempered brother’s out there who have good hands & better photo skillz.

  12. Why would she keep stepping on all those rakes if it didn’t get her off?

  13. “Britney Spears’ Monster Comeback”? Well she *is* getting big as Godzilla

  14. Go rough young man

    She strikes back? I felt it!

  15. Rihanna Rolling Stone
    Commented on this photo:

    Startin to look like a tranny, trick

  16. Bringbackbabalu

    Damn she is ugly.

  17. cc

    I don’t like her, but I’d damn sure let her do the ‘Sideshow Bob’ on me.

  18. She is looking sexy in those shorts. I would love to bend her over that balcony, spank her ass, grab her hair, then spread her cheeks with my cock.

  19. That Guy

    ” I do think I’m a bit of a masochist. It’s not something I’m proud of…”

    Yet you embraced it and made a single about being whipped and tied up, god I fucking hate celebrities, 100% full of bullshit.

  20. Rihanna Rolling Stone
    err?
    Commented on this photo:

    Ass photoshop?

  21. She may not be proud of it, but she also seems to have accepted it and probably feels no need to change it or fight it. (BTW, if you do like to go there, you sure as hell need to be able to trust your partner, so that’s reason No. 4,397 why she’ll never give Brown another chance.) Anyway, I don’t see a lot of bullshit or hypocrisy in her making that single – or that statement.,

  22. ” I do think I’m a bit of a masochist. It’s not something I’m proud of…”

    yeah we all know that. My impression of this asshat. is that she loves to be punched. then calls the cops.

    bottom line. Drama llama of the extreme level.

  23. kpatra

    Britney doesn’t even get the cover anymore.
    Rihanna’s ass is hot.
    So Chris Brown is gay, right? I mean all that rage and his pretty face and those geekoid green shoes? I think I get it now. Sad. Pitiful.

  24. The Listener

    The fact that she’s disappointed she hasn’t received any penis photos lately even though she knows that photos like that end up on the internet tells me that either a) she hasn’t learned she shouldn’t take naked photos of herself from the release of her own nude mirror image photos on the internet last year or so, or b) she flat out doesn’t care if people all around the world can see her naked on the internet.

    A camera phone in the hands of a horny woman is a dangerous thing.

  25. Clarence Beeks

    try a little harder to sound ‘sexy” Rhianna. what a fucking idiot- when she’s 40 and reads this interview, she will be mortified at what a schmuck she was.

  26. AC

    Difference between rough sex and getting punched yes, blah blah blah. But could this girl be a bigger jackass? She needs to go back to school and stop assaulting my ears with her yodeling AND her stupidity. She’s like an island Jewel.

  27. Ksurfiws

    I’d Hit It

  28. Rihanna Rolling Stone
    DonDopey
    Commented on this photo:

    SWEET! A Ricky Gervais article!

  29. Rihanna Rolling Stone
    Joaquin vanden Penis
    Commented on this photo:

    Rihanna doesn’t give me a boner.

  30. Ed

    That’s what I’m doing wrong! I need to send MORE PENIS PICTURES!

  31. The Critical Crassness

    Wow Fish! Boobs and Chris Brown all in the same post….bet the old hit-o-meter went right through the ceiling on this one….

  32. dpbefun

    I would do her…in the butt.

  33. sideshow_bob

    she looks like me.

  34. Yeah, i don’t usually hate, but..yeah, Trash.

    I’d still hit it though. No not literally, unless asked.

  35. cc

    I admit it, given the opportunity, I’d give her a spanking.

  36. Her music is generic and lackluster. And her image is so tacky, this look is terrible.

  37. Mandi

    Wait wait wait. Their personal life SHOULDN’T affect his career? Glad we breezed right by that and focused on the kinky sex thing.

  38. boli

    she probably likes it in her snickers maker.

  39. FishBone

    Carrot Top? They should have run howard on the cover again. Baba Booey! Baba Booey! Howard Stern Rules!

  40. Rihanna Rolling Stone
    Commented on this photo:

    Soo much red hair on head….sooo much photoshop on ass.

  41. LJ

    Note to women:

    If you have a liking for S&M as a major part of your sex life, DO NOT date guys with anger issues.

  42. Juano

    Always amazing how celebrities demonstrate their complete and totally vapid worldview. “Gee, if I talk about how much I like to get banged, that will PROVE I’m a big time artiste!” Reality is she’s probably a lousy lay.

  43. lohan8ball

    I just sent her a pic of my wang being used like a whip. Well more like a bat. She gonna like that.

  44. Rihanna Rolling Stone
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    She told the stylist “I want to emphasize my big bulging forehead”.

  45. Johnsaf

    This bitch needs to change her hair or something… She looks like the illegitimate love child of Ronald McDonald…

  46. Rihanna Rolling Stone
    fartbucket
    Commented on this photo:

    it’s good to see Carrot Top is aging nicely.

  47. Eli

    In summary: Ho..fo’ sho.

  48. Rihanna Rolling Stone
    Commented on this photo:

    Does it make my gay if I point out that Carrot Top has a very nice ass?

  49. pete

    I think Carrot Top has totally owned all of us here today .

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