Ricki Lake questions John Mayer’s game

December 13th, 2007 // 44 Comments

Ricki Lake is getting the word out that, despite the rumors, nothing happened between her and John Mayer. Mostly because John Mayer lacks sufficient skills with the ladies. People reports:

“I met him at a party. He admitted he had a crush and I admitted, hey, vice versa. That was it. I wish there was actually something to tell. There was nothing.
“He was adorable. Nice,” Lake told the PEOPLE reporter. “[But] I’ve been more intimate with you than I was with him.”

So there you have it: According to Ricki Lake, John Mayer has the romantic skills of a People magazine reporter. That sounds pretty close to how I pictured it. I always assumed conversation with John Mayer was similar to suffocating yourself with a plastic bag. But without the eventual satisfaction of losing consciousness.

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Comments (44)

  1. First | December 13, 2007 at 5:01 pm

    First.

    Reply
  2. Simon Scowl | December 13, 2007 at 5:04 pm

    And here I thought there wasn’t anything less likely than somebody having a crush on John Mayer or Ricki Lake. Her story is unlikeliness squared.

    Reply
  3. holla@meh | December 13, 2007 at 5:06 pm

    oh. my. god.

    she looks like a dude in a dress!
    and by that, i dont mean dragqueen, just simply, a dude in a dress.

    Reply
  4. Ted from LA | December 13, 2007 at 5:11 pm

    What the People Ragizine reporter didn’t mention was he was fucking her like a newly released prisoner when she made that quote.

    Reply
  5. wtf | December 13, 2007 at 5:15 pm

    THE JESSICA ALBA IS PREGNANT

    Reply
  6. Phil | December 13, 2007 at 5:15 pm

    That guy is as gay as Jimbo

    Reply
  7. wtf | December 13, 2007 at 5:16 pm

    THE JESSICA ALBA IS PREGNANT and we’re reading about fuckin RICKI LAKE?!
    The only reason I even impregnated The Jessica Alba was to make front page of the Superficial. Oh well.

    Reply
  8. veggi | December 13, 2007 at 5:21 pm

    I thought he admitted he had a crush on her, and she admitted she could crush him.

    Reply
  9. chauncey gardner | December 13, 2007 at 5:26 pm

    I question his species.

    Reply
  10. tp | December 13, 2007 at 5:28 pm

    John Mayer is a fagalar…yuck…

    Reply
  11. Auntie Kryst | December 13, 2007 at 5:34 pm

    Goddamnit Fish, why are you always showing pictures of Ricki Lake? Carnie Wilson is waaay hotter.

    @8 nice one!

    Reply
  12. tp | December 13, 2007 at 5:41 pm

    John Mayer is a fagalar…yuck…

    Reply
  13. thegrayway | December 13, 2007 at 7:33 pm

    I can’t even begin to describe how nauseated I feel hearing John Mayer has a crush if Ricki Lake – i mean seriously – wasn’t she the fat chick from Hairspray??

    Reply
  14. julee | December 13, 2007 at 7:39 pm

    I don’t like her. A guy disclosed her nasty personal life to interracialconnect.com which is a niche interracial dating site. It caused huge discussion there

    Reply
  15. Cuesta_Rey | December 13, 2007 at 8:04 pm

    She is probably old enuf to be his mother.

    Looks like somebody rearranged her face.
    Her nose points ot the left of the camera.

    Reply
  16. L.Linus | December 13, 2007 at 8:35 pm

    I’m looking at Ricki Lake and imagining her naked with boobs and I hope a big bush down there.

    Reply
  17. Dude | December 13, 2007 at 8:36 pm

    This post is as lame as John Mayers music. That douche must have scuba gear for beer goggles, because I’d have to be down a keg and a qualude to even consider dropping in to that trainwreck…now all I need is the qualude..’hic’..

    Reply
  18. mordecai1988 | December 13, 2007 at 8:39 pm

    Let’s see – she’s newly thin, seriously hot and very, very horny for John Mayer, and he still can’t close the deal? Turn in your guitar, dude – you’re a disgrace to musicians everywhere. Meanwhile, come over to my place, Ricki – I’ll show you that your body is a wonderland.

    (OK, that was too much. Sorry.)

    Reply
  19. roughdaddy | December 13, 2007 at 9:18 pm

    look you dont want to get rejected, by a girl that have the tendency to gain an extreme amount of weight!!! good thinking on his part…

    Reply
  20. zz | December 13, 2007 at 9:42 pm

    DAMN, I haven’t heard the name Ricki Lake in YEARS.

    #13
    The fat chick in hairspray?? You mean John Travolta?
    You fag.

    Reply
  21. zz | December 13, 2007 at 9:42 pm

    DAMN, I haven’t heard the name Ricki Lake in YEARS.

    #13
    The fat chick in hairspray?? You mean John Travolta?
    You fag.

    Reply
  22. Did ya hear? | December 13, 2007 at 9:54 pm

    Did ya hear about Ellen Degeneres? She drowned. Yeah. They found her face down in Ricki Lake…

    Reply
  23. Danklin24 | December 13, 2007 at 10:28 pm

    I’m really getting tired of superfish putting down John Mayer. John would own him in a battle of wits. The guy is also a musical genius. Go see him live then come back and tell me he’s a douchebag.

    Reply
  24. justtheobvious | December 13, 2007 at 10:29 pm

    She isn’t as fat as before, but she is still ugly.

    Reply
  25. qiuye | December 13, 2007 at 11:11 pm

    She is so sexy with the gorgeous dress on her. I heard that she appeared on a millionaire&celebrity dating club Richcupids.com

    Reply
  26. gerard Vandenberg | December 13, 2007 at 11:30 pm

    It’s really nice to see when a woman reach the age of fourty or fifty she dresses up “YOUNG” again!! Although BEWARE of the TEN dollar prostitute!!

    Reply
  27. storm | December 14, 2007 at 1:13 am

    lots of people have reportedly died face down on rikki lake,.. i thought she had dried up years ago,……i didn’t think she still exsited! why are we still taling about her?

    Reply
  28. Dude | December 14, 2007 at 1:44 am

    He “is” a douche. Folksy rock is as dead as Ricki Lakes pre op penis.

    Reply
  29. John | December 14, 2007 at 1:51 am

    Jesus!!! She’s old and ugly
    I just have interest in military girls.
    Sexy ,hot and with some kind of wild.
    Isn’t it amazing?
    Consult http://www.militaryfriends.com/photo/Lisa0914
    It shows you a military world has nothing to do with weapons and
    wars,but all about military love and romance.
    Have a try .You’ ll surely like it

    Reply
  30. John Mayer is awesome | December 14, 2007 at 4:06 am

    Man -

    John Mayer is awesome, what’s up with the hatin’ from the writers of the superficial? That dude is talented, down-to-earth AND witty to boot…you need to let up on him!

    Reply
  31. D. Richards (Hands.) | December 14, 2007 at 9:53 am

    Okay. John Mayer is playing “Fat girl game”. FGG is where you hit on a heavy set low self-esteemed girl; and then you wait. The compliment (yeah right) or hit is all our heavy-set sweat box can think about for days and days. She becomes overcome. “Nobody ever hits on me”. “Maybe he’s different”. Nope. He’s playing FGG. Open your mouth, fatty. Here comes toad.

    The only thing that confounds me is that Mr. Johnny Mayer is a huge rock star, right? And FGG is normally played by drunken men that just gotta bust, that night. What are you playing at, Mr. Mayer? Surely you see better grade backstage.

    Maybe her just likes his women hammy. (And I don’t mean out-going.) Buttcheeks!

    Reply
  32. DA | December 14, 2007 at 11:22 am

    #31, you sound like you know the drill real well.
    Fat chicks are easy to fuck, they’ll take any cock they can get.

    Maybe Ricki looks like his Mother and we all know a boys best friend is his Mommy.

    Reply
  33. total douchebag | December 14, 2007 at 11:47 am

    I’d hit that shit. You know she’ll let you do some freaky shit to her and then she’ll fix you something to eat. You know she can eat. I would like to have a threesome with her and Rachael Ray!

    Reply
  34. Gina | December 14, 2007 at 12:14 pm

    What is up with all the stupid fat girl comments and calling John Mayer homophobic slurs. Didn’t your mothers tell you to be nice or else you may have kids that are called the same names. Stop hatin!

    Reply
  35. MMB | December 14, 2007 at 12:36 pm

    I love that the Indian idiot fake poster with the dating site ads even says she’s gross! LOLOLOL

    Reply
  36. D. Richards (Surgeon.) | December 14, 2007 at 12:40 pm

    #32? I spotted a fat girl! Don’t be upset, sweety. You can always go on a diet. Chunk.

    Reply
  37. Jeanile | December 14, 2007 at 3:31 pm

    Thank you #34. You sad little boys are a bunch of ignorant sounding twats. Can’t wait until all you guys hit 40 and your guts are so big you won’t be able to see those tinsie little pricks of yours. And then you’ll realize what a meaningless existence you lead, having spent your time hating on fat girls and gay guys. Pitiful little bastards you are.

    Reply
  38. Anon | December 14, 2007 at 3:53 pm

    Sounds like you hit 40 Jeanile and you guts so big it’s reducing the echo that occurs naturally between your legs and are no longer sure anythings still there. Any sensitivity went years ago.

    Whats up? guys never played FGG with you and now you realise what a meaningless existence you lead bitching about guys using typical insults about their bodies because your insecure with your own. Sad little cow you are

    Reply
  39. groonk | December 15, 2007 at 4:27 am

    yes, because Riki Lake is the best news source ever.

    Reply
  40. gaspar | December 15, 2007 at 11:02 pm

    she looks older more than i expected but someone said she joined an online service sugarmommymeet. it is a site for rich women to date young cute men.. spoil and support them. what the hell…

    Reply
  41. Jeanile | December 16, 2007 at 3:37 pm

    Sorry to bust your nut #38 but I’m not even close to 40 and so fucking what if I was? What are you always going to be 19, fool? The only echo I hear is the one that’s broadcasting live from between your ears. Too bad you’re too weak to form an original thought on your own, instead having to rely on your frat boys to know what to say and do. “Typical” my ass. Try forming a thought of your own before you open your hole. Conformist little self-castrated bitch.

    Reply
  42. Willis | December 16, 2007 at 4:54 pm

    He obviously left out how much he hates stretch marks. I can’t think of two people whose gossip would be less interesting. Oh wait, Jordan and Andre.

    Reply
  43. Shallow Val | December 17, 2007 at 8:45 am

    18 – She’s been thin for at least ten years so that’s not newly thin

    Reply
  44. dagodfather | February 18, 2008 at 3:34 pm

    Riki Lake Sux! She needs to go Back to the early 90′s and stay there! There is nothing interesting about Riki and I don’t belive one word she says about John

    Reply

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