Richard Simmons Is Okay, Maybe

On Saturday, the New York Daily News published a long-ass article suggesting Richards Simmons is being held hostage by his maid that I didn’t read because it’s a long-ass article about Richards Simmons being held hostage by his maid. However, I did see the 8,000 headlines it spawned, and clearly, so did Richard (or his maid) because he called into both Entertainment Tonight and TODAY to assure everyone that he definitely is not being held hostage. He just doesn’t want to ever leave his house or let anybody in. See? Nothing to worry about. PEOPLE reports:

No one is holding me in my house as a hostage,” he said, noting that he is in good health. “I do what I want to do as I’ve always done.”
“I’ve taught, like, thousands and thousands of classes and, you know, right now I just want to sort of just take care of me,” he said. “I just really don’t want to do anything. I just don’t want to be traveling anymore. It certainly has taken its toll on me.”

And just in case this fitness lady hasn’t protested too much:

“I am not kidnapped,” Simmons said. “I am just in my house right now.”
“No one should be worried about me,” Simmons told ET. “The people that surround me are wonderful people who take great care of me.”

In related news, authorities have reached out to Arnold Schwarzenegger who has agreed to do everything in his power to confirm Richard’s safety.

“Alright, governor, once you’re inside, we need to you look around as much as possible.”
“Don’t vorry, I von’t be looking down. Trust me on dat one.”
“What?”
“Nothing.”

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Photo: Getty