Reese Witherspoon is Definitely Pregnant (According to All This Speculating)

July 15th, 2011 // 27 Comments

“Scout’s honor, I didn’t tell no one. Please don’t chin me.”

Here’s Reese Witherspoon visiting Jim Toth’s office yesterday and pulling the ol’ giant purse in front of the baby bump trick that I recognized immediately from the days of Kim Kardashian trying to make her ass look smaller because she honestly thought she could stay famous based on her personality and knew she was never more than two bear claws away from looking like a Thanksgiving turkey smuggler. Anyway, Reese also sported heels to make herself not look like this because, again, an avid runner shouldn’t have the ass of Jennifer Love Hewitt who is the universal measuring stick log for determining if a woman is with child. Now, keep in mind Reese Witherspoon famously sued Star in 2006 for falsely reporting she’s pregnant, so I’m really risking a lawsuit here to prove something I’ll immediately find boring right after its confirmed. I’ve got life figured out, is what I’m saying.

Photos: GSI Media

superficial

  1. Snooki's Taint

    Speaking of asses, who stole Reese’s pieces?

  2. so toth works at a fertility clinic? a porno one at that, judging from the heels on that lab coat chick

  3. Vivian

    oooh Me want the chick’s lab coat and her shoes o_0

  4. JC

    I love the stripper heels on the doc. Hollywood really is a magical place.

  5. The Critical Crassness

    Just goes to show that you can print the pictures for the horse’s asses but you can’t make them understand the visualizations presented….the white coat isn’t a lab coat and the chick in stripper shoes isn’t a doctor…..but that doesn’t mean Reese is less likely to be pregnant……or more likely either…..just means that Fish is still doing his research at Luckless Larry’s Lounge and Shushi Parlor.

    • Vivian

      Of course she’s just a regular girl with a white coat and high heels, but where’s the fun in that? She’s in Hollywood it makes perfect sense for her to wear that and for us to make fun of it.

  6. bonnieux

    When did stripper style shoes become sooooo in fashion???? i mean , i can understand why kim kardashian wears ‘em cause she’s a fame whore… but they are so ugly, don’t like ‘em people look bad in them too

  7. Reese Witherspoon Pregnant Baby Bump
    Pip pip cheery-o
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yeah, ohmigod, he put it right in HERE, and now I’m pregnant!” *girl squeals*

  8. Hey, isn’t that broad in the middle the one who banged Schwarzenegger?

  9. It looks like she’s asking housekeeping to take an oath not to let her husband grope them.

  10. Reese Witherspoon Pregnant Baby Bump
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    “I won’t tell anyone you’re pregnant. Scout’s honor.”

  11. Edwin

    It looks like shes about to snap her fingers, starting a fight a la West Side Story.

  12. x

    Why isn’t the mobile site working anymore? The pictures are all low-res and pixelated, and half the pictures don’t show up at all!

  13. the captain

    is there something in the food?
    WHY IS IT THERE ARE ONLY AMERICAN LOSERS BORN IN CALIFORNIA?

  14. Reese Witherspoon Pregnant Baby Bump
    Mike701
    Commented on this photo:

    On my mother’s grave I didn’t know birth control looked so much like Altoid Minis!

  15. Reese Witherspoon Pregnant Baby Bump
    TGNY
    Commented on this photo:

    Where is the booty. Upper and lower back strictly

  16. Reese Witherspoon Pregnant Baby Bump
    miguelito
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh Lord, I’m-a crazy actress!

  17. Reese Witherspoon Pregnant Baby Bump
    Banks Bradenton
    Commented on this photo:

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