WHEN Bilbo Baggins isn’t battling Smaug on his quest to the Lonely Mountain, he enjoys a good read atop the many ponies afford by the Shire. You, too, can pick up a book and go wherever your imagination takes you! — Or smell like someone dropped a jar of Vlasics in a condom factory. Seriously, I can’t be the only one smelling that… Oh, right, inspire the children. GOOO BOOKS! (I’m losing consciousness.)
Photo: Splash News
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Claire | September 7, 2010 at 5:06 pm
she tries so hard and fails so miserably.
Rush | September 7, 2010 at 5:30 pm
no amount of lysol will make that horsey rideable again.
“mommy, she ruined it with goo!”
Johnny | September 9, 2010 at 4:01 pm
You sir owe me a new keyboard! I LOL’d my drink on it!
Gym Tan Laundry | September 7, 2010 at 5:58 pm
You realize she is reading The 48 Laws of Power. This is a seminal (no pun intended) book on Machiavellian tactics and how to guide on screwing people over. There is no way she made it past page 20 – much too heady.
Burt | September 8, 2010 at 1:20 am
A great deal of these “laws” contradict one another. In other words, the book isn’t as ”heady” as you think.
Amy | September 8, 2010 at 2:19 pm
She’s probably like Lauren Conrad in the episode of Family Guy.
jennyjenjen | September 8, 2010 at 2:50 pm
Agreed, the book is hardly heady. More an interesting history book.
a REAL man | September 7, 2010 at 7:24 pm
It ain’t right man…it just ain’t right!!!
Doc Schweinstrudel | September 8, 2010 at 12:48 pm
that’s how you potty train them
annon | September 9, 2010 at 6:54 pm
im impressed i would figure that would colapse who knew a childs toy could hold up a bus
McFeely Smackup | September 7, 2010 at 5:08 pm
Is she getting fatter by the day?
Jesus fucking christ, there’s so much FAIL going on in this one photo, it’s like a clip from Tosh.0 with 20 seconds on the clock.
Anyone else a little disturbed by the fact that Snooki is reading “The 48 Rules of Power”?
Drew | September 7, 2010 at 5:38 pm
The funny thing is Snooki is more popular, and relevant than “tosh.o”
I had to actually Google it. I find it funny that someone can justify using a show based off internet meme’s as an analogy, yet condemn the cast of Jersey Shore as being wastes of space. Douchebags meet insecure WoW fags. Battle of the worlds biggest tools.
McFeely Smackup | September 7, 2010 at 5:42 pm
the difference isn’t subtle. Daniel Tosh is actually funny and entertaining. and his show is on after Futurama, so it’s got that going for it too.
Esoteric | September 7, 2010 at 5:45 pm
Daniel Tosh is a comedic genius if you actually had to google him to know who he is then you’ve been missing out. Though judging by your comments it would appear you spend your time watching the troglodytes they scraped up for Jersey Shore and therefore couldn’t be expected to know good TV/humor if it bit you in the ass. They say your IQ drops a point for each pound snookie gains, you might want to quickly adjust your TV viewing habits.
thg | September 10, 2010 at 8:15 pm
Agreed. While the bashing is entertaining and usually spot on a majority of it is nerds trying to make funny comments.
Sheena | September 7, 2010 at 5:48 pm
I would have been disturbed – until I thought about it and came to the realization that she actually looked at herself in a mirror that morning and went out dressed like mini-Sasquatch anyway. Thus proving she must be blind, and therefore incapable of comprehending what she is ‘reading.’
Jon H | September 7, 2010 at 8:38 pm
I figure she’s just the kind of tool who reads that book.
Bryan | September 8, 2010 at 1:30 am
Daniel Tosh is a comedic genius? Wow. That’s so funny YOU may be a comedic genius.
Esoteric | September 8, 2010 at 10:41 am
I am!
Thanks so much for noticing :-) my day is complete now.
khephran | September 8, 2010 at 7:02 pm
I believe so.
BB | September 7, 2010 at 5:10 pm
What’s funny is that she thinks it’s believable she’s that far into the book. We all know she can’t even count to 48.
dudeatdudedotdude | September 7, 2010 at 7:47 pm
at least it’s not an upside down My Pet Goat
Mohammed's Taint | September 8, 2010 at 2:14 pm
That was photoshopped, moron
havoc | September 7, 2010 at 5:10 pm
In the name of all that is holy. Please stop posting this shit.
Its getting cruel…….
.
Jakester | September 8, 2010 at 7:48 am
Seriously. This is a bullshit posed picture, she threw on glasses, picked up a book to look smart and went out into public. Sites like this posting this kind of SHIT is what allows talentless fat cunts to earn far more money than they deserve.
Cameo | September 8, 2010 at 10:47 am
Actually, its those of us actually reading these articles and taking the time to post about them afterward. The press would stop posting these if we would stop looking at and commenting on them. Obviously we are unable to do so.
Vito | September 8, 2010 at 12:28 pm
How can you say she’s a “talentless fat cunt”? Why she’s…well, I hear she has…wait a sec…she really could be…ummmmm.
Never mind. You’re right!
Marley | September 7, 2010 at 5:11 pm
Good Lord I am so glad I am not her.
A7X_Chick | September 7, 2010 at 5:13 pm
I suppose it’s saying something that the book isn’t upside down.
Not saying MUCH, but I suppose it’s something…
MrsEllis | September 7, 2010 at 5:28 pm
Hey A7X rock! Love em.
Drew | September 7, 2010 at 5:40 pm
Avenged Sevenfold is the Jersey Shore of metal.
MrsEllis | September 7, 2010 at 8:18 pm
Your loss man.
AdanRyder | September 9, 2010 at 5:10 am
Metal is the Jersey Shore of music.
fuckitall | September 7, 2010 at 5:16 pm
what a fucking pig.
USA | September 7, 2010 at 5:20 pm
Hey world, check out america’s hottest celeb… she is going to be rich for life, adored by millions and influential to how our maturing your girls think and act. Dont like it? too bad :) Shes hot, and shes ours. USA FTW!!!
IbdaJudge | September 8, 2010 at 12:47 pm
My little Punkin is almost nine, and even she know a fat useless cunt when she see’s one!
grobpilot | September 7, 2010 at 5:26 pm
Even though I’m sure that book is written in English, to her it most likely looks like Chinese.
blank | September 7, 2010 at 5:28 pm
Okay… so let me get this straight… her only claim to fame is being a douche bag and hanging out with douche bags? She has no talent at all… like none, doesnt write, sing, dance… isnt even witty or funny and yet she is a star?
I mean seriously wtf is the world coming to where we are making these fat stupid pigs celebrities? We hold them up as “examples” of outstanding Americans, and then are confused when the world hates us?
How many “No talent” celebs do we need? There is these idiots from Jersey Shore, Kim (I am famous cuz I fucked a black guy on film) Kardashian, Nadya (I have 8 kids) Suleman, Kate (I also had 8 kids, make me rich) Gosselin, Paris (I also made a sex tape, and I am already rich but I want attention) Hilton… really what the fuck is next?
Lima | September 7, 2010 at 5:40 pm
Blank i understand your point, and i think your right.
But people dont care so much for celebrities that do charity, go to Church or stay at home.
SamJo | September 7, 2010 at 5:44 pm
I agree, celebs these days have no staying power. I mean, they ALL are riding out their 15 minutes of fame….no more actual “STARS”….were stuck with these illiterate tools….wah.
blank | September 7, 2010 at 5:48 pm
Forget charity, church and staying at home! How about a celeb that has a fucking talent? One that can… act, write, sing, anything? This twat (along with the rest of her breed) is literally a celeb because shes arrogant, fat, stupid and has no talent. What does that say about people value systems?
Whats next, making prisoners in jail a celebrity? Doing a reality show with a pedophile in a day care to see what might happen? Or how about a show where we idolize someone for stealing cars?
grobpilot | September 8, 2010 at 8:25 am
We already idolize those who have a history of stealing cars, dealing drugs, gang-banging, whoring, etc… Look at just about any rapper. Damn near every one of them has a record and accompanying jail time
blank | September 8, 2010 at 12:31 pm
@ Samjo I am no fan of most rap… honestly I think rap died years ago, But at least, those fuckers have to right some shit down, and if they don’t write their own shit then at the very least they have to rap it. What I am saying is they have to earn their keep. Fucking tools like snookie and the rest, dont do ANYTHING… I mean for fuck sakes even the whole premise of the show is based on nothing.
“Snookie, you are a fat ugly pig, with no talent, no skill, no education and your annoying… we would like to follow you around with a camera, make you famous and give you huge cash checks every week”
How does this happen?
WonderWoman | September 8, 2010 at 8:29 pm
Ugh, I can’t stand rap. It is materialistic garbage. The only songs I ever like that have rap in them are those about something meaning such as domestic violence and child abuse. “Booty chatter” is made for losers without a drop self-respect. The video whores are just a skip and a hop away doing porn…smh.
WonderWoman | September 8, 2010 at 8:31 pm
@WonderWoman “…away [from] doing porn…smh”
EDIT: Typo.
Crabby Old Guy | September 8, 2010 at 8:25 am
Blank – you are spot on. And be careful with your “ideas” on that last post – because you just KNOW that some weasel in Hollywood will think, “Hmm…tracking a pedophile who works in a daycare center…that’s GENIUS!” -and there’s your new show on Bravo or MTV (god, I miss the days of Martha Quinn!).
blank | September 8, 2010 at 12:33 pm
lmao you are so right… wonder what they will call it?
Crusty | September 7, 2010 at 5:29 pm
On behalf of that pony, I’m calling PETA..
Esoteric | September 7, 2010 at 5:50 pm
LOL
IbdaJudge | September 8, 2010 at 12:50 pm
Fucking genius Crusty!
Dude | September 7, 2010 at 5:32 pm
Damn, she gots a big ol ass! I mean its like its so big. Its like out there.
AdanRyder | September 9, 2010 at 5:12 am
They only like her because she looks like a total prostitute. She’s just so….GUIDO
Lima | September 7, 2010 at 5:38 pm
I know she isn’t the best example of talent, intelegence, solidarity, etc.
But, beside’s that I like her. She must have some star quality, because millions try to be famous and dont achive and she did it.
I dont like the “guido” type and I’m skinny but she’s not thoes ugly things that people say.
McFeely Smackup | September 7, 2010 at 5:44 pm
“I dont like the “guido” type and I’m skinny but she’s not thoes ugly things that people say.”
What?
Esoteric | September 7, 2010 at 5:48 pm
Does not compute.
Selvero | September 7, 2010 at 6:31 pm
Sorry Lima, but the fact that you can’t even spell ‘intelligence’ says something about why you’re a supporter of someone that offers nothing to the world in terms of relevance or purpose.
Lima | September 8, 2010 at 3:16 pm
Sorry Selvero, My written English is terrible. English is not my mother tongue and I never had lessons. Where I live nobody speaks English, since the main languages are different.
You are so right, I have to stop feeling sorry for people like her.
We are a minority that supports artists with talent, even MTV, follows the path of the trash tv, most times.
Vito | September 8, 2010 at 12:32 pm
You better watch your ass before the DEA comes crashing through your front door.
pimp | September 7, 2010 at 5:50 pm
i’d fuck her in the asshole?…
Taz | September 7, 2010 at 5:58 pm
Way to take one for the team.
McFeely Smackup | September 7, 2010 at 6:05 pm
You’d fuck The Situation?
Esoteric | September 7, 2010 at 7:54 pm
hahahaha and In the words of the immortal Dr. Sheldon Cooper … BAZINGA!
Esoteric | September 7, 2010 at 7:58 pm
FYI Fish I hate your new comment system, it sucks. I don’t want to have to upsize every damn picture to read all the witty retorts, make them all centralized again.
Alejandra | September 7, 2010 at 5:55 pm
Ewok feet! She`s fatter every freaking day!
guy rossi | September 7, 2010 at 6:01 pm
There’s no way her stupid guidette brain can handle that book. I’m somewhat smart and I WAS planning to re-read it to internalize the material. Think I’m just gonna burn my copy
Racer X | September 7, 2010 at 6:02 pm
I’d hit it.
/leave the glasses on
heading to rough managemant classes | September 7, 2010 at 6:03 pm
Boring! I want to see my favorite star, Deena Diesel…
Alan Smithee | September 7, 2010 at 6:04 pm
The Horsemen are drawing nearer
On leather steeds they ride
They’ve come to take your life
On through the dead of night
With the Four Horsemen ride
Or choose your fate and die
Vito | September 8, 2010 at 12:33 pm
Burma Shave
Nik | September 7, 2010 at 6:11 pm
sometimes i might point out superficial flaws on some of the chicks on this website, but if one day they magically asked me to to do them, i would almost never no
snooki is a major contributor to why i had to use the word “almost”
dani | September 7, 2010 at 6:18 pm
Meme alert!
Heading to rough management classes | September 7, 2010 at 6:20 pm
Don’t try it spelling nazi…
Codex | September 7, 2010 at 6:21 pm
Yeh i’d fuck that. :D
galtor | September 7, 2010 at 6:39 pm
At least the book isn’t upside down.
anonym | September 7, 2010 at 6:39 pm
HOT !!!!
those glasses make her look shexy
posterchild | September 7, 2010 at 6:48 pm
who is more disgusting. the gaga whore or that thing on the horsey.
or guys like codex who would even fuck that (maybe he means the horsey). for fuck’s sake would you please stop posting sumo snooki pics.it makes me sick to my stomach. seriously fish, fake some tast.
jdivo | September 7, 2010 at 6:54 pm
Looks like MTV has enlisted the endless talents of the photographer behind all of those realistic Heidi and Spencer photo shoots.
Blondie | September 7, 2010 at 7:12 pm
SHE IS A BIG FAT UGLY BEAST’ SHE SHOULD GO AND HAVE A COSMETIC SURGERY OVERHAUL………AWFUL
timmy the dying boy | September 7, 2010 at 7:30 pm
I don’t remember Jabba the Hutt putting in an appearance in “The Hobbit.”
Rufus The Cat | September 7, 2010 at 7:37 pm
Jesus christ, now superficial is doing the whole you can make anything out of bacon meme. Yeah we get it, a humanoid/mongoloid made entirely out of bacon. great. the real question is, “Will it blend?
just lookin | September 8, 2010 at 12:23 am
you just posted the same exact thing on the pics of J-WOWW.
puddleduck | September 7, 2010 at 7:38 pm
What a big heap of shit she is! Is this all you people have to post, it’s not even entertaining …. it’s just sad and pathetic. This show and the thugs who are in it aren’t worth the celluloid it is was filmed with….
just lookin | September 8, 2010 at 12:25 am
what exactly makes them thugs? i havent seen them do a single thing that would actually classify them as thugs.
GravyLeg | September 7, 2010 at 7:40 pm
What is really scary is the book she is reading isn’t standard sized, it’s a pocket sized paperback.
Oh, and The Trail of Tears called and it wants it’s fucking boots back… WTF
Frenchie | September 7, 2010 at 7:50 pm
Awww….zee Snookie. She eez a delicate bedpan filled with gin, adrift on a sea of tanner stained pubes. She eez the feces produced when stupidity eats promiscuity. She eez…oh, how you say….fuckpig.
Frenchie | September 7, 2010 at 7:52 pm
Pubes.
Frenchie | September 7, 2010 at 7:53 pm
Ah yes, zee Snookie…she eez a delicate bedpan filled with vodka, adrift on a sea of tanner stained pubes. She eez…how you say…fuckpig.
Michelle | September 7, 2010 at 9:07 pm
Wow just wow
RasputinsLiver | September 7, 2010 at 9:12 pm
*
OH FOR THE LOVE OF SOME GOD OR OTHER!!!
Not one single decent Fap-worthy chick on the front page?!?
You were doin’ so good up until this weekend. What happened to ya, man?
*
shorty | September 7, 2010 at 9:16 pm
All I can think of is, that horsie needs to really really be sanitized. Before they let any children near it. Maybe even scrape it off real good also.
IbdaJudge | September 8, 2010 at 12:55 pm
Not enough, just destroy the motherfucker and put up a small cross in it’s place.
Marcus | September 7, 2010 at 9:47 pm
is she knocked up
yowillie | September 7, 2010 at 10:53 pm
She’s as big as a rhino.
cc | September 7, 2010 at 11:29 pm
Hmph, that’s some high tensile strength steel in that playground toy. NASA builds these now?
captain america | September 7, 2010 at 11:31 pm
WOW, she really SHITS like this?
just lookin | September 8, 2010 at 12:32 am
i like watching Jersey Shore never thought I would until I did lol it keeps me laughin thats for sure. I dont really care for a single person on the show just like to watch the drama. my question is though to the guys on the show wouldnt she n J-WOWW be considered “gernades”? (probably spelled wrong)
fap | September 8, 2010 at 12:38 am
She has no leg, it’s just an extended bum with knees at the end.
nisro | September 8, 2010 at 12:45 am
She’s got the shape and attitude to be a High School lunch lady.
God | September 8, 2010 at 2:50 am
What is that ?
Rick's Daddy | September 8, 2010 at 4:16 am
Moo
welldoneson | September 8, 2010 at 5:46 am
BURN HAT HORSE
AND BRING ME THE HEAD OF THE ASSHOLE WHO KEEPS POSTING PICTURES OF THIS GAY GNOME
tod | September 8, 2010 at 8:11 am
fat
shavederic | September 8, 2010 at 9:03 am
Who is this broad anyway?