Presumably to teach Spider-Man that the Internet is reserved for breasts and intercourse, Playboy has released rare photos of Christina Hendricks from the July 1999 issue (above). Except I can’t help but notice something seems off. Gigantically off. Like I’m finding out Santa Claus isn’t real, but it’s giving me an erection. That can’t be healthy.
*fondles a wreath*
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nudity…where art thou?
I fail to see anything interesting in this post, but maybe that is because I have a vagina.
well then…let’s see your vag.
I love vaginas. Give yours a nice, wet kiss for me!
I have a vagina too and I see intresting things in this post. There’s the clown for a start.
Proof that she has implants hidden under a thick layer of fat. I knew it!
Wow, 12 years ago she was 50lbs less talented.
I really like her and would eat her ass if she was 50 lbs heavier than she is now, and really should hate your post. But I can’t, because it was hilarious…
Oh Fish…..turn it off….TURN IT OFF…..IT BURNS
More hot men from Fish, he sure did turn gay this year.
Nah, Fish knows that the ladies like to read and enjoy the eye candy too. He’s just pleasing the ladies.
Maybe its the lighting , or future weight gain but where are her titties?
especially her right one!!
where is her right can??
First, as in Numero Uno.
I don’t know, if you take your mouse and outline all the way from the side to the middle, it would still make a pretty big boob and don’t forget she’s put on some pounds in the last 11 years. She didn’t look as busty on Firefly either.
I thought she was pretty busty on Firefly.
i agree! she’s still a good c-cup, at least, if you actually take a look. at first glance they look small, but if you actually look at they way they lie, they are pretty big.
they jury is still out for me about whether its weight gain or fake ones….i lean towards a bit of both. she had nice sized boobs before, but i think as the rest of her grew (and i am not saying she’s fat – i think she still looks pretty good), she wanted to keep her boobs ahead of the trend and got some implants.
There is only so much grace I can extend this woman for her performance on Firefly. I think I need to accept the fact that she is no longer a super-fine ginger… *sniff….
Agreed…she is (sadly) no longer “shiny”. I am now the Sad Clown of Life. “Mrs. Reynolds”, indeed!
LMAO… I miss “Mrs. Reynolds” too. That is worth adding back to my Netflix streaming again just to rewatch that episode…
I hate –love– to have to smack you with some hardcore disillusionment, but she never was a super-fine ginger. She’s actually a blonde, but has been dying her hair since childhood.
Real? Fake? A Jedi cares not for these things…
She has neckders. Shouldeck? Shneckldres? HERNECKANDSHOULDRESARETHESAMETHING!
Like Henry Rollins without the muscle tone. So like the opposite of Henry Rollins but with a fat neck.
she had to work out that neck & back to hold up those bowling balls
Is Playboy holding back or what? Pictures of Christina outside of Playboy reveal a voluptuous and playful woman, packing a full round of ammunition to take down the strongest man.
Yet … all we get are nibbles with these so-called Playboy pictures.
SCAM!
Randal
fake bitch
When I put on 10 lbs during the holidays/post break-up, I jump from a b-cup to a nice C. This woman has atleast 30 lbs on her since that picture. That’s where those titties came from.
30 pounds? Try about 60 lbs.
A bra can also make a huge difference. I know my chest looks way bigger than usual if I wear a padded and sometimes a padded pushup (which shouldn’t exist for those my size, 34F/36E) vs. a non padded bra.
Padded 34F??? Is it bulletproof?
My wife has 36F and a padded/push-up bra would be dangerous. She almost knocks herself out with them in a normal bra, a push up is just asking for a boob to the head.
WTF
Well, she ain’t fat.
Where are they? Where?
Lying in a Beverly Hills plastic surgeon’s cabinet I guess.
Life is a series of illusions being destroyed. This is one of them.
not fat???? bitch is obese.
That clown scares the shit outta me.
Ronald McDonald post boob job.
Sorry about this random post. I didn’t notice the clown at first. I always thought that Hendricks looked like Ronald McDonald.
How could you not notice that clown?
Applying for titty fuck plz….
So that is what it looks like right before you cross pollinate Molly Ringwald with bacon fat, I should have thought of this in the 80′s… Get me Marty McFly, Doc, and Ferris Bueller…. And put Mc Guyver and Jude Law on standby…
You are trying to hard to get into “The Most Important People on the Internet” Round up at the end of the week.
Actually it is trying too hard. But good job spelling everything else correctly. Post something funny or don’t bother.
Hint: The blogger prefers one liners of less than a dozen words.
I thought it was funny. Why are there so many trolls on here? A joke is a joke. Count it!
Funny. But should have just stopped at bacon fat.
its like that girl in the background is just cheering for you to beat off.
I do cocaine!!!!!
If all you can find to do while you’re on it is post here, then ur doin it rong.
I get the reference sasafrasatata.
I don’t know what Toki sees in that guy.
shouldn’t it be c-c-c-c-c-c-cocaine
am I the only one grossed out by that dude’s leg?
She has big boobs now because she gained a bunch of weight but hides it with a girdle or some other fancy-pants thing she stole from the Mad Men set. You can tell in the show..
She may look like an hourglass on the red carpet but once the corset comes off it’s obvious she’s an apple.Which means she gains in her stomach and breasts,while her legs stay skinny.So it’s possible she didn’t get implants
wow Christina Hendricks posing there with a guy and three blondes in a bikini.
Oh, lololololol.
is her boob melting? her boob is melting.
I thought that too but its the bleach blonde pigatil blending with her pale skin.
Guess the cat’s out the bag… lol
I hope that I’m able to get this image the next time I see her; but suddenly her present-day photos look like Julianne Moore in a fat suit.
Win! Well said! I LOL’ed
nips or bust!
i never understood why people think this chick is hot. She has a huge rack but so does every other fat chick and no one cares.
preach on…
I don’t think she is hot. I think she is an overrated fat pig.
This image was twelve years and about a 100 lbs. ago. No wonder her tits are so much smaller, but then again so was her butt!
Everyone is neglecting to notice how horrifying this whole picture is.
We finally know Hugh Hefner’s secret power, he can make boobs grow 10x their natural size. God bless you Hugh, god bless you!
which one is she?
Yeah which one is she? Is she the black guy?
Really…I dont know. assuming shes the one on the far right.
I think I had a dream like this once. Only there were TWO clowns.
Also from 1999:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nEjRy–Mgz8&feature=player_embedded
Yeah, it’s just the lighting. They’ve always been there. I know she’s a pillar for being comfortable with your size, but shit, doesn’t it just make you wish she was a tad thinner? Oh well.
WTF is going on in that picture. Why the fuck is there a clown. Is that orange thing John Boehner?
I have nightmares from this shit thanks TS
Hysterical…
I think the orange guy was on Nip/Tuck
Holyshit, WTF happened to her?!?!?!?
Food.
Time.
I love it. It’s art!
Ms. Hendricks looks fine.
I wish I could come up with a good joke about the orange man.
Some women (like me and Christina here) tend to gain a lot up top when they put on weight. She’s clearly much heavier now than she was 10 years ago.
Oh please. As a female there’s no way you actually believe that crap.
frist?
anyone who has studied even a little bit of biology knows that weight gain in women leads to fat distribution in specific areas, one of them being the breast.
and the hips. That’s where I gain… Right now I’m closer to her in MadMen than I am in this pic – however, I have to say, even when I was this skinny in college from the boob down, my boobs were still a full C cup (currently a D, when I was fatter, a DD, but I Digress) now I’m thinking the sacrilegious – that she had some implants done, got fat, and called it her natural state. Damn. Not fucking fair.
Everyone who’s walked down the street more than once knows that not every woman gains in the same place…
I am a true hourglass shape. When I lose weight I notice it in my waist first.
yes and weight gain over implants now explains her current state. there is no way that’s weight gain alone.
good
fake tits under fat. they always look real.
WAIT, U GUYZ ACTUALLY THOUGHT THOSE HARD AS ROCK MASSIVE TITS WERE REAL!!!??? LOL WISHFUL THINKING I GUESS…
she was probably straving herself to be a model at that point….first thing to go is the funbags…..much better now
you people are way to generous. it’s more like 80-100lbs difference…
real or fake who cares…..i’d pay her to tie me to a chair and beat me sencless with them
fake tits…..woman are the most deceiving
Bullshit, if dick implants were as easy to get as boob implants, every guy would have them.
Word.
Nice photos of the Insane Clown Posse. And who are the guys in the costumes?
Rare for good reason. Three albinos and a clown straddling the Nip/Tuck guy isn’t exactly arousing.
Some of us like women to be pale & glowing.
It makes them easier to find in low light situations.
Totes Frank. I can’t get enough Firecrotch Nosferatu either.
Meh. She’s not a real redhead, why would I expect her to be a real tithead either?
they’re fake (now)
This proves what I thought – she has FAT boobs. Blech.
Boobs are fat, moron. Unless you like fake hard bolted on knockers, GTFO.
I imagine any photos of her that don’t require a wide angle lens WOULD be quite rare….