Rare Christina Hendricks Playboy Photos

January 13th, 2011 // 165 Comments

Presumably to teach Spider-Man that the Internet is reserved for breasts and intercourse, Playboy has released rare photos of Christina Hendricks from the July 1999 issue (above). Except I can’t help but notice something seems off. Gigantically off. Like I’m finding out Santa Claus isn’t real, but it’s giving me an erection. That can’t be healthy.

*fondles a wreath*

Photos: Playboy, WireImage

superficial

  1. peanut

    nudity…where art thou?

  2. Wow, 12 years ago she was 50lbs less talented.

    • Mark B

      I really like her and would eat her ass if she was 50 lbs heavier than she is now, and really should hate your post. But I can’t, because it was hilarious…

  3. Oh Fish…..turn it off….TURN IT OFF…..IT BURNS

  4. Maybe its the lighting , or future weight gain but where are her titties?

  5. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    Hugh Gentry
    Commented on this photo:

    where is her right can??

  6. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    first
    Commented on this photo:

    First, as in Numero Uno.

  7. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    Trillian
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know, if you take your mouse and outline all the way from the side to the middle, it would still make a pretty big boob and don’t forget she’s put on some pounds in the last 11 years. She didn’t look as busty on Firefly either.

    • I thought she was pretty busty on Firefly.

    • yup

      i agree! she’s still a good c-cup, at least, if you actually take a look. at first glance they look small, but if you actually look at they way they lie, they are pretty big.

      they jury is still out for me about whether its weight gain or fake ones….i lean towards a bit of both. she had nice sized boobs before, but i think as the rest of her grew (and i am not saying she’s fat – i think she still looks pretty good), she wanted to keep her boobs ahead of the trend and got some implants.

  8. GravyLeg

    There is only so much grace I can extend this woman for her performance on Firefly. I think I need to accept the fact that she is no longer a super-fine ginger… *sniff….

    • Crabby Old Guy

      Agreed…she is (sadly) no longer “shiny”. I am now the Sad Clown of Life. “Mrs. Reynolds”, indeed!

      • GravyLeg

        LMAO… I miss “Mrs. Reynolds” too. That is worth adding back to my Netflix streaming again just to rewatch that episode…

    • Rather Dashing

      I hate –love– to have to smack you with some hardcore disillusionment, but she never was a super-fine ginger. She’s actually a blonde, but has been dying her hair since childhood.

  9. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    Jackie
    Commented on this photo:

    She has neckders. Shouldeck? Shneckldres? HERNECKANDSHOULDRESARETHESAMETHING!

    Like Henry Rollins without the muscle tone. So like the opposite of Henry Rollins but with a fat neck.

  10. Randal

    Is Playboy holding back or what? Pictures of Christina outside of Playboy reveal a voluptuous and playful woman, packing a full round of ammunition to take down the strongest man.

    Yet … all we get are nibbles with these so-called Playboy pictures.

    SCAM!

    Randal

  11. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    Peter
    Commented on this photo:

    fake bitch

  12. iamhomosquirrel

    When I put on 10 lbs during the holidays/post break-up, I jump from a b-cup to a nice C. This woman has atleast 30 lbs on her since that picture. That’s where those titties came from.

  13. WTF
    Well, she ain’t fat.
    Where are they? Where?
    Lying in a Beverly Hills plastic surgeon’s cabinet I guess.
    Life is a series of illusions being destroyed. This is one of them.

  14. dR

    That clown scares the shit outta me.

  15. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    xerozs
    Commented on this photo:

    Applying for titty fuck plz….

  16. colin

    So that is what it looks like right before you cross pollinate Molly Ringwald with bacon fat, I should have thought of this in the 80′s… Get me Marty McFly, Doc, and Ferris Bueller…. And put Mc Guyver and Jude Law on standby…

  17. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    ohyeah
    Commented on this photo:

    its like that girl in the background is just cheering for you to beat off.

  18. sasafrasatata

    I do cocaine!!!!!

  19. testington

    am I the only one grossed out by that dude’s leg?

  20. ilikesake

    She has big boobs now because she gained a bunch of weight but hides it with a girdle or some other fancy-pants thing she stole from the Mad Men set. You can tell in the show..

    • qwerty

      She may look like an hourglass on the red carpet but once the corset comes off it’s obvious she’s an apple.Which means she gains in her stomach and breasts,while her legs stay skinny.So it’s possible she didn’t get implants

  21. lightdragon

    wow Christina Hendricks posing there with a guy and three blondes in a bikini.

  22. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    Commented on this photo:

    is her boob melting? her boob is melting.

  23. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    DM
    Commented on this photo:

    Guess the cat’s out the bag… lol

  24. nahhhhh

    I hope that I’m able to get this image the next time I see her; but suddenly her present-day photos look like Julianne Moore in a fat suit.

  25. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    boing
    Commented on this photo:

    nips or bust!

  26. seth

    i never understood why people think this chick is hot. She has a huge rack but so does every other fat chick and no one cares.

  27. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    Reggie Rhino
    Commented on this photo:

    This image was twelve years and about a 100 lbs. ago. No wonder her tits are so much smaller, but then again so was her butt!

  28. maemers

    Everyone is neglecting to notice how horrifying this whole picture is.

  29. CptCreep

    We finally know Hugh Hefner’s secret power, he can make boobs grow 10x their natural size. God bless you Hugh, god bless you!

  30. tits

    which one is she?

    • mamamiasweetpeaches

      Yeah which one is she? Is she the black guy?

      Really…I dont know. assuming shes the one on the far right.

      I think I had a dream like this once. Only there were TWO clowns.

  31. cj

    Also from 1999:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nEjRy–Mgz8&feature=player_embedded
    Yeah, it’s just the lighting. They’ve always been there. I know she’s a pillar for being comfortable with your size, but shit, doesn’t it just make you wish she was a tad thinner? Oh well.

  32. compound9

    WTF is going on in that picture. Why the fuck is there a clown. Is that orange thing John Boehner?

    I have nightmares from this shit thanks TS

  33. Drundel

    Holyshit, WTF happened to her?!?!?!?

  34. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    I love it. It’s art!
    Ms. Hendricks looks fine.
    I wish I could come up with a good joke about the orange man.

  35. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    k
    Commented on this photo:

    Some women (like me and Christina here) tend to gain a lot up top when they put on weight. She’s clearly much heavier now than she was 10 years ago.

  36. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    Chongo
    Commented on this photo:

    frist?

  37. anonym

    anyone who has studied even a little bit of biology knows that weight gain in women leads to fat distribution in specific areas, one of them being the breast.

    • Chupacabra

      and the hips. That’s where I gain… Right now I’m closer to her in MadMen than I am in this pic – however, I have to say, even when I was this skinny in college from the boob down, my boobs were still a full C cup (currently a D, when I was fatter, a DD, but I Digress) now I’m thinking the sacrilegious – that she had some implants done, got fat, and called it her natural state. Damn. Not fucking fair.

    • qwerty

      Everyone who’s walked down the street more than once knows that not every woman gains in the same place…

    • somethingoriginal

      yes and weight gain over implants now explains her current state. there is no way that’s weight gain alone.

  38. fdsgfds

    good

  39. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    hello
    Commented on this photo:

    fake tits under fat. they always look real.

  40. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    jako
    Commented on this photo:

    WAIT, U GUYZ ACTUALLY THOUGHT THOSE HARD AS ROCK MASSIVE TITS WERE REAL!!!??? LOL WISHFUL THINKING I GUESS…

  41. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    still hit it
    Commented on this photo:

    she was probably straving herself to be a model at that point….first thing to go is the funbags…..much better now

  42. ou812

    you people are way to generous. it’s more like 80-100lbs difference…

  43. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    still hit it
    Commented on this photo:

    real or fake who cares…..i’d pay her to tie me to a chair and beat me sencless with them

  44. Christina Hendricks Playboy
    Frank
    Commented on this photo:

    fake tits…..woman are the most deceiving

  45. jumpin_j

    Nice photos of the Insane Clown Posse. And who are the guys in the costumes?

  46. Rare for good reason. Three albinos and a clown straddling the Nip/Tuck guy isn’t exactly arousing.

  47. Life Serial

    Meh. She’s not a real redhead, why would I expect her to be a real tithead either?

  48. zo

    they’re fake (now)

  49. Mel Gibson's Shrink

    This proves what I thought – she has FAT boobs. Blech.

  50. GravyLeg

    I imagine any photos of her that don’t require a wide angle lens WOULD be quite rare….

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