Rachel Uchitel has standards. Who knew?

Rachel Uchitel has reportedly signed a deal to pose in Playboy but only under certain conditions, according to TMZ:

Rachel hedged when we asked her about a Playboy offer on TMZ Live on Friday — but we found out that Tiger Woods’ #1 mistress has already struck an agreement. A source close to the mag tells us Rachel has the right to pull out any time before the shoot goes down — which is in three weeks.
We’re also told Rachel won’t be baring it all — just the backside … and the topside.

So let me get this straight: Rachel Uchitel will bang married men, flash her ass and tits in a magazine but won’t let anyone see her vagina. Which means it’s tattooed with a mural of Tiger Woods hitting a 9-iron into her clitoris. That nun at the bus station owes me a dollar!

Photos: Splash News