Programming Note: Jessica Simpson’s Huge Lactating Breasts Are Still Huge

Posted by Photo Boy

A lot of you have threatened to jump off bridges if Fish doesn’t somehow fold in penis jokes and comic book references into his Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchison broke up souffle. I apologize for the sad state that you find your lives in, but since it allows me to earn money for writing this in fleece pants, I also thank you immensely. So while he gets that together — and I’m told it’s his magnum opus to tranny famewhoredom — please enjoy these candid photos of the entirety of Jessica Simpson squeezed into a dress clearly only designed to hold 2/5ths of her. We bring you the news you want, when you want it (only in this case slightly delayed by huge lactating breasts).

Photo: Pacific Coast News