THE ROYAL CAR SEAT STRAPS ARE ALL WRONG! STOP THE INTERNET!

The Superficial / July 25, 2013

“I can’t flip anybody off in here! RELEASE YOUR KING AT ONCE.”

Some people might say this site is the worst possible type of blog imaginable, soul rotting, bullshit even, and those people would be mostly right except they’d be forgetting there’s still one step below me: Mommy blogs. Case in point: The arguments for Sharia Law over at BabyCenter who lost their fucking minds over the above photo of Prince George in his car seat for a photo op outside the hospital. Because this was, of course, exactly how Kate Middleton was going to take the kid home in an armored SUV with no less than 10 Mary Poppinses inside. Even better, being goddamn monarchs leaving a hospital in England should naturally be like the time you left with your newborn, Bry from Omaha, so thank you for mentioning that your hospital inspected your car seat first. That was incredibly useful information. And, well played, “laughinggirl127″ for going straight to Princess Di dying in a car accident. For a minute there, I thought this was going to get way over-dramatic:

How sad since wills mom died in a car accident. Horrible. Even if you were unsure how could you look at that and think yep that’s it with the strap falling off. Smh.

Look, I’m extremely friendly to the feminist cause, and will be the first to say that for the most part woman still have it way shittier than men. But if your thought process is to doom a child to dying in a tragic car accident just like his grandmother because you spent an entire afternoon memorizing the Graco manual, maybe it should be illegal for you to read and write. Don’t get me wrong, it was a nice idea, but sometimes things don’t work out. You understand? (Distract her with shoes while I get the net.)

Photo: Getty, WENN