Paris Hilton launched her new fragrance “Paris Hilton Can Can” at Macy’s in Long Island yesterday. And, son of a bitch, she still looks pregnant! It’s almost like she’s been getting dressed in the morning and saying, “I want to wear an outfit that will freak the living shit out of anyone with a basic idea of who I am.” At least I’m hoping that’s what’s going on here. Wait, why is she holding a cake? Pregnant chicks love cake. I saw that in a movie once, so it’s pretty much a scientific fact. Ah, Terminator. Once again you’ve educated me more than those book things.
Photos: Bauer-Griffin.com























arewhyan | November 14, 2007 at 11:07 am
first. i thought you had to have a vagina to be pregnant. hmmm you learn something new every day
Crotch Kicker | November 14, 2007 at 11:07 am
I still say she looks far more stupid than pregnant.
Bleak Jackson | November 14, 2007 at 11:09 am
It’s the new black.
Banquo | November 14, 2007 at 11:10 am
Does Tim Burton know she stole the Nightmare Before Christmas Font for her Can Can logo?
claire | November 14, 2007 at 11:15 am
5TH!!
MID | November 14, 2007 at 11:16 am
Tranny. Fucking ugly tranny. I hate hate hate her.
Me | November 14, 2007 at 11:16 am
It’s my kid
SSS | November 14, 2007 at 11:19 am
EWWWWWW! Check out her back in #5 & #6! What is wrong with her back, ewwwww!
LL | November 14, 2007 at 11:20 am
I second Crotch Kicker – “I still say she looks far more stupid than pregnant.”
Again, it’s the dress, and the stupid way she’s standing.
JaniBalto | November 14, 2007 at 11:21 am
#8: That’s her fur!
Who is that guy in picture #4? It looks like Christopher Plummer. Nah. Can’t be. Right?
ICanDoItParis | November 14, 2007 at 11:21 am
Paris my dick is board certified to get you pregnant with a son. So far I only make boys. If you’d like to bank my donation please call.
Big | November 14, 2007 at 11:22 am
I wonder if aids started in that stinky twat. I think she has been doing elephants. they are the only beasts on earth big enough for her to have any feeling.
FRIST!!! | November 14, 2007 at 11:29 am
Her “baby bump” resembles Adrian Grenier..
SippinDaSizzurp | November 14, 2007 at 11:29 am
I bet it will belong to Chris Angel or a cockroach.
Spanky | November 14, 2007 at 11:29 am
She also still looks:
retarded
skanky
vapid
ignorant
beaky
wonky
inbred
Mal Reynolds | November 14, 2007 at 11:29 am
I hope to god she is pregnant!! It will be a laugh watching her cart around her kid like one of her dogs.
IHateParis | November 14, 2007 at 11:30 am
I despise this thing! I believe that her fluids could destroy any sperm that would dare venture into any of her orifices.
I have to go feed my dog now. Hey, Paris! May I borrow your nose for a minute? I can’t find my can opener.
veggi | November 14, 2007 at 11:31 am
“Paris Hilton Can Can” what? not open her other eye?..
Phy | November 14, 2007 at 11:38 am
THE CAKE IS A LIE
Guy | November 14, 2007 at 11:39 am
&8
Thats her anorexic fur you get so you don’t die in winter.
IHateParis | November 14, 2007 at 11:40 am
pic 2 – With all of her money, she doesn’t even repair her trashed Louboutins. They’re scratched to shit with the red sole on the heel half peeled off. Maybe that just happened spontaneously when the shoes realized they were on Paris’ sasquatch feet, but that’s still no excuse.
Oliver | November 14, 2007 at 11:41 am
Does this chick have any other shoes/ handbags apart from this set???
Check out the pic 2, and the chipped red sole on the Louboutin heel.
Sizzurp | November 14, 2007 at 11:41 am
Honestly, the lip-stick picture the other day did it for me. I mean that bitch just oozes stupidity. I bet banging her would be like banging Jessica Tandy now, with a touch of that Hilton rotten crotch.
veggi | November 14, 2007 at 11:46 am
She’s got a hot body, but I bet in her case an assfinger would taste like some dude’s day-old spunk. Sort of like fudge-ripple tapioca.
Bonkni | November 14, 2007 at 11:48 am
If she is pregnant, I hope the baby has feet like hers and is delivered breech.
glyniss | November 14, 2007 at 11:51 am
i still dont believe she’s pregnant. she just wants attention.
my comment | November 14, 2007 at 11:55 am
HOW MANY more times is she going to wear those SHOES!?!?!
Look at pic #4…… they are showing it.
L.Linus | November 14, 2007 at 11:56 am
This has got to be the most tired person on earth. She has done nothing for anyone in her entire life. She sucks, she can’t act, can’t sing does suck a mean dick. Other than that she just a pus-filled piece of rhino shit on a cracker. Go the fuck away please!!!
IHateParis | November 14, 2007 at 11:57 am
@ 24 – Eeewwww! You just helped me decide to forgo lunch.
Now I am going to go and grab a hold of some porcelain in the bathroom. I hope I make it…
Crotch Kicker | November 14, 2007 at 11:58 am
#15 she also looks like prehistoric monkey shit that has been flung against a cave wall that was then pissed on by Big Foot. To say she looks like hammered shit is far too kind. She looks like the kind of shit that has been seriously abused.
D. Richards (Mainline.) | November 14, 2007 at 12:02 pm
The end-of the world is upon us! Paris with spew the Anti-Christ shortly. I hope to god she’s not pregnant. I don’t wanna die. The only way to stay alive is to find Paris, before she purges death from her womb, and pierce her heart with a rusty screwdriver. Then ejaculate on to her corpse’s face. Then drag her body behind a jeep, grinding her tits and ass (what ass?) off. On my way!
You know what I wanna see really bad? More pictures of fucked-up Jenna Jameson. Yummy!
Nicolerox | November 14, 2007 at 12:07 pm
Stop the freaking INSANITY! I didn’t believe it yesterday when I saw the picture. But this outfit, OMG! She totally looks pregnant (among other things)! Look how the cake presses against her dress. Her stomach is definately out there.
pennynickle | November 14, 2007 at 12:15 pm
Paris Hilton would have to be the biggest waste of space on this planet. Oh, by the way Paris, how is your home for women who have been released from prison going? You know, the one you said you were going to build for female inmates who, unlike you, have fucking nothing?
Don’t let that wonky eye put you off, Paris.
JayJayJay from Uruguay | November 14, 2007 at 12:20 pm
Didn’t she have an abortion once? Just wondering…………….
off to the masturbatorium | November 14, 2007 at 12:20 pm
Remember when Anna Nicole Smith died suddenly from a butt abscess? And Britney had a nervous breakdown and shaved her head? And Paris went to jail? And Lindsay…was Lindsay?
It’s gotten really fucking boring…
Martina | November 14, 2007 at 12:21 pm
Really slow news day
doomhammer | November 14, 2007 at 12:23 pm
(spoken in soft low voice)
ladies and gentlement, this is indeed a rare glorious moment. Its not everyday we witness the rare exotic slut bird in her natural habitat. feast thine eyes!
lila | November 14, 2007 at 12:25 pm
The cardboard cut out looks better than she does…she should just stay home and let cardboard work for her. Put it this way, the cardboard won’t not listen to anybody, if it gets out of line, you can just punch it and then pick it up…no lawsuit. If the cardboard gets a drink spilled on it at a club, just wipe it off, good as new! If the cardboard wants to sleep around, just fold its legs up and throw it in the closet…Problem solved.
chris | November 14, 2007 at 12:26 pm
dude…Paris is NOT pregs!!! she jsut needs some NEW SHOES!!!!!! why on earth would she wear thoes Louboutin’s when they look like a pair of beat up street hooker shoes!
Nikk | November 14, 2007 at 12:32 pm
Wooo….those Louboutins are looking tiiiiirred.
oooh | November 14, 2007 at 12:34 pm
she’s giving birth to a herpie
Jimbo | November 14, 2007 at 12:34 pm
She IS pregnant and I did it with my Micro-Machine. Only took 3 rufies to knock her out although i could have just put it on her shoes and let the flies do the rest.
FRIST!!! | November 14, 2007 at 12:36 pm
Beer belly..
veggi | November 14, 2007 at 12:36 pm
bet she thought she was gonna jump outta that cake….. silly hooker..
whackjob | November 14, 2007 at 12:50 pm
Webster’s Dictionary. See: wonky
BunnyButt | November 14, 2007 at 12:50 pm
#10, based on the outfit and how he’s ogling Paris, my guess would be Hugh Hefner. When he’s not wearing pajamas, Hugh wears groovy outfits like that – shirts unbuttoned enough to show his saggy, wrinkly old man chest and pimp/new age-hybrid jewelry. Christopher Plummer would dress more elegantly and not be salivating over Paris, whereas Hugh salivates over any blonde under 30 because he can no longer see well enough to distinguish between truly attractive women and a piece of meat with boobs.
Giggles | November 14, 2007 at 12:52 pm
I know this is not politically correct to say, but she really is UGLY.
craigj | November 14, 2007 at 12:58 pm
She’s not pregnant, just showing the affects of too much alcohol and not enough vegtables. Since when was vodka a food group?
What’s up with her eye BTW?
Celebrity Clothing Line | November 14, 2007 at 1:10 pm
I’d rather not believe she’s pregnant…who would be foolish to go raw up in that???…well on the other hand their is the Hilton family fortune…good looking to the lucky dog…who did it and struck it rich!
Ted from LA | November 14, 2007 at 1:31 pm
I’m so lazy I married a pregnant woman.