Hey Dolph! Can you do some action poses for us.

No! I’m not a fucking douchebag like Jean Claude.

Was he sharing a sleeping bag in the park with Brigitte Nielsen las night?

Ok, don’t smile dude, it doesn’t suit you!

Never has a movie been so appropriately titled.

“I must break wind…and then you”

Two coat pockets were so yesterday.

I once ate a chocolate squirrel.

Is his full name Dolphin?

“Hurry up with the picture, I have to get back to my spot on the 405 off ramp.”

“I must break you.”

Wow look at the reinforcement required in that waistband… it’s like they had to sew an extra one on there.

The loaf I am pinching is not human, it is a piece of iron.

I’m no menswear pro but, isn’t that tie a little short?

And the judges score this round in favor of Jaundice.

Who the fuck dresses this guy and why did they steal his razor?

That awkward moment when you smell “old person smell” and realize it’s you…

Looks like he’s about to tie a bunch of balloons to his house and head to South America with an Asian boy scout.