superficial

  1. BP

    His next stop should be at Best Cuts!

  2. I loved that story you posted a couple years ago from that famewhore that slept with him, then proceeded to complain about how smelly and hairy his crotch was as she was blowing him.

  3. “My douche locator app keeps pointing at me.”

  4. “When you’re a big star like me and Stephen Dorff you don’t have to care.”

  5. His ring tone is “Smell Yo’ Dick.”

  6. crb

    And now, for my next trick,

    I fit this iPhone 5 into my mouth,

    sideways!

  7. crb

    Look at my majesty! Look at it.

    I’m like an American Apparel ad unfolding before your eyes.

    Wait, I’ll film it for posterity.

  8. Vinnie! Hey Vinnie! Vincent! Hey! Hey Vinnie! VINCENT! Vinnie. Vinnie. Vinnie. Vincent. Hey Vinnie.

  9. “The s-s-spotted d-d-dog j-j-jumped on J-J-Jane and b-b-began t-t-to hump h-h-her l-l-leg…‘S-s-stop that s-s-said D-D-Dick. Sh-sh-she is a v-v-vir-vir-virgin-ian.’”

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