“Hello? Giant Sunglasses R Us?”

Are we still pretending she’s a celebrity?

Or that she was ever one in the first place?

You’re supposed to drop those in the recycle box after the movie is over.

I just nodded off, this might be the most boring girl on earth.

“Grrr, I wish I could make phone calls with my iPod.”

“Hello, I am calling to see if I can get another 15 mins of fame?”

I like her but she peaked a few years ago

“damnit, even my phone’s telling my I’m boring it to suicide.
never should have gotten that smartphone…”

Thank you for calling Apple’s iPhone support. We appreciate your business. Currently all of our operators are busy assisting other callers. Your expected wait time is….3….days….

“Hello future are you there?” “Hello…..hello.”

Kinda flat. For some reason, I thought Lauren Conrad had hills.

Hello, is the Fashion Design Institute? Someone suggested I enroll…

Everyone knows you need one phone to talk, one phone to text, and one phone to take nude pictures

“Hang on, I’m getting a call from Lauren Conrad. Hello? What? Who is this? This is Lauren Conrad. Yes I know, I’m Lauren Conrad. No I’m Lauren Conrad. Hello? What number did I dial? No, that’s my number. You must have dialed wrong. I did? Oh sorry. No problem. Thanks, Bye. Bye.”

“Hello, Suicide Prevention? I’m feeling like I…huh? Yeah, I’ll hold.”