1. “Just left some of my patented Firecrotch-level Herpes to yet another satisfied – and unsuspecting – customer!”

  2. She isn’t really winking – she lost that eye in a knife fight with a bum who took her coke. She won, though – you should see the other guy.

  3. Can I buy some Coca Cola?


  4. it had to be said

    Said the John, “well, sorry, but I wouldn’t have gotten it in your eye if you hadn’t pulled off.”

  5. George P Burdell

    ♫♫ Lousy with virginity
    ♫♫ Won’t go to bed ’til I’m legally wed

  6. Classic case of jizz-eye.

  7. I hear it burns when it gets in your eye.

  8. “Oh, I’LL be there! And I’ll probably even be EARLY!”

  9. Flatliner

    Looks like a dick is coming straight at her and she doesn’t want to go cross-eyed.

  10. cc

    I know right? You go to do some blow in the car and the next thing you know you’ve stuck yourself in the eye with your straw.

  11. buzz

    Yep…she rockin’ on AID’s dime

  12. Pretty sure this is just how she blinks at this point.

  13. “It’s just a date, wink wink”

  14. Schadenfreude

    I am SOBER! It means Some Other Billionaire Expects Restitution.

  15. Did you know that if someone with the clap gets semen in your eye, in can cause conjunctivitis and blindness? Knowledge is power, Lindsay.

  16. Vivid Exec

    Money shot went high right.

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