Hi, Angelina?! Just doing my daily check in! Still with Brad? Ok, byyyyyeeeeeee!!!

Nice soulpatch shithead!

BTW, I fucking hate you!

Just a quick call to wife number 29.

Are you kidding? I’m doing great! Oh, I’m very certain I can do better than Angelina Jolie! Also, have I mentioned I’m in a band? I think it’s really going to take off, so I won’t have to work in movies anymore.

Herro Grasshopper!

“Brad? Is this Brad? Hey! Just calling to let you know your wife not only fucked me, but married me! Put that in your pipe and smoke it. Bye now!”

I love his Frontera Grill!

Yes, I know its PBS humor, so shoot me.

Haha! In the thumbnail that little soul patch looked like a drive-thru mic.

“…and with my sandwich I’d like some of them French-fried taters…”

Eating at the Y: You’re doing it wrong

“They’re taking my picture? I must be relevant again. That makes me so happy!”

I just knew this was going to be a Howie Mandel has AIDS post.

He’s heard that he was selected for a conjugal visit by Sandusky.

That phone hasn’t had a charged battery since May ’11.

What possessed him to dye his hair such a dead animal brown?

Hey BB, you were right, You WERN”T good enough for Angelina. She’s a SUPERSTAR, you peaked with “Slingblade”. But hey, at least you tapped dat thang.

Soulpatch…yes. Soul……..not on your life.

“Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moon light?”

Auditioning to be the new Ernest P. Worrell.

This is the best Steven Tyler has looked in a long time.

That’s not a soulpatch…after Angelina left he swore he’d never wash his chin again.

He looks like Ashton Kutcher in 30 years. Still just as douchey.

Looks like bad santa hasn’t crapped right for a week.