1. I’ve never seen spackling paste applied with a makeup sponge before.

  2. Thus completing the transformation to W.C. Fields.

  3. Whoever makes that makeup needs to market it as a miracle worker and show Madonna before and after pics. Of course, it’s probably full of the blood of virgins and placenta.

  4. Her makeup artist has to be the devil himself.

  5. EricLR

    Is that a makeup artist or a wax sculptor?

  6. Thanks, but I’ll wait for “Kate Upton: The MDMA Tour”

  7. Paula Deen

    See that? Now if only we can get them dark fellers to do the same thing, now THAT would be a show!

  8. “damn it, we won’t get our deposit back from Mme Tussaud’s!”

  9. Emma Watson's Vagina

    make up artist: Now, if you’re blue
    And you don’t know where to go to
    Why don’t you go where fashion sits
    Puttin’ on the Ritz


  10. So they’ve made Albert Nobbs into a stage show?

  11. caley

    “Don’t worry, ma’am, I worked on the set of ‘Death Becomes Her’, I know how this works…”

  12. Hundred of thousands of dollars spent on doctors, injections, hormone applications, cosmetics, and a small army of makeup men, Yet a single gnarled, withered index finger gives it all away.

  13. At least Judy Garland had the good sense to drink herself to death at an early age.

  14. Little Tongue

    At least, she learned to cover up her senior hands…

  15. Skin falling off my bones
    Never want it to
    What am I to do?
    I can’t help it…

  16. “Drink the blood of which child? This one? The one I’m pointing at? How am I supposed to know which one to suck dry if you don’t show me? I’m not draining them all. I’m not a monster.”

  17. Allion


  18. To make John Waters appear, put on drag queen eyebrows, stare into a makeup mirror, and say his name six times.

  19. cc

    I already have one of their credit cards, I don’t need more.

  20. I think that makeup guy moonlights at a mortuary.

  21. stucco


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