1. This is my ducky.
    There are many like it but this one is mine…. for eternity.

  2. That chick is flat-out duckin’ crazy.

  3. dirt dog

    i give their marriage a year tops.

  4. Taken right before he threw a toaster in the water. No jury will convict him.

  5. “Stop lookin’ at me SWAN!”

  6. -”Buying this swan buoy was the second best decision I ever made!!!”
    -”Honey, what number am I?”

  7. I am assuming she is sending a message to her husband with this photo. It is either about choking him to death or drowning him if he tries to leave her.

  8. “Dis how swan look!”

  9. George Costanza

    Her fake cans look kind of small. Did they shrink in the cold water?

  10. ThisWillHurt

    “Take a picture of me with my floaty then put it on Instagram!”
    “If I do, will you take off my tracking collar? It’s really starting to chafe.”

  11. I bet the husband picked out the swan in hopes that muteness is contagious.

  12. fred

    I know this one. The story of the ugly duckling. And the swan.

  13. Are you deaf, bitch! I did *not* say “squeeze my duck”.

  14. anonymous

    She gives off crazy with her arms wrapped around an inflatable swan’s neck too.

  15. Crazy or not, she’s all kinds of fuckable.

  16. Fuck a duck

  17. asdf

    dont know anything about the dude, but i sure hope there’s some sort of prenup to protect her.

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