“What’s small and purple and fucks you in the ass? No, not haemorrhoids….”
You are my hero.
“This man… This man is my stand-in for straight love scenes..”
Press: “Hey Tom, whose your favorite rent boy?”
“Look, I popped the button off his shirt just by pointing my finger at it. That’s the power of Scientology, people.”
What’s got one finger pointing at him now, but will have an arm in him up to the elbow later? THIS GUY!
“I finally found a full grown man shorter than me!”
“THIS guy has the best-tasting sausage in Vienna!”
Finally found someone who fits him (and there’s no high heels gala risk)
“This guy is getting it in the ass later on tonight”
“Hahaha I love this guy! No really, I love this guy.”
I’m already twice your age, Felix, but I’ll be happy to play you in that movie about your awesome jump from the edge of space – maybe it’ll finally make me cool again.
“we represent The Lollipop Kid”
I believe you’re thinking of the “Lollipop Guild.” But you were close!
Who would have thought the guy wearing the purple velvet suit is the more masculine of the two?
“I fucked him.”
“This guy is going to go out and buy some shoes with lifts in them so he can be tall and rangy like me!”
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Tom Cruise at a press junket for 'Oblivion' in Vienna. (April 2, 2013) -Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN