One man’s crusade to ruin titties and nipples for future generations.
He must WANT us to comment on his moobs.
If you had tits like that you’d put em out there too.
Comment on? Perhaps he wants us to do something else to his moobies.
Are they turning anyone else on? Hope it’s not just me. :(
“My hair looks like a vajayjay and my breasts are pointing straight ahead, if I just purse my lips I’ll be working it hard.”
How cold IS it in London? He could cut glass with those things!
You’d think 30 billion dollars would buy you a decent support bra.
Son, I am disappoint. And cold.
At least there’s a bit of him that can be proud
Ole’ Simon need to start wearing a ‘Manziere’ . . . or is it a ‘Bro’?
Yes, but is he vagazzled?
Missing from this picture: Black Microphone.
How the hell does this picture feature more nipple action than Katy Perry’s before this?
of all the douches, this is the granddaddy douche of them all
Giving Katy Perry a run for her mo… damnit, fartbucket!
Simon’s on the moob. I mean move.
His nipples are so used to being uncovered they are actively trying to tear the shirt off his chest.
I wonder if Randy Jackson is into white people with big tits.
Those are looking bigger. Did you get implants, Simon?
Oh just pierce them already!
Hi Katie Perry, I mean Simon.
Nice rack, Jessica Simpson.
Wow! Chaz Bono is looking great after shaving that beard and losing weight!
Better titties than Sarah Jessica Parker anyway
Hey, Nicole Kidman isn’t leaking anymore!
“Game on, Hoff!”
I think his tits are bigger than mine.
I call MOTORBOAT!
it’s called a Wonderbra, look into it!
Just like spandex for women; these shirts need a PSI rating for men.
I bet Kate Hudson’s green with envy
People are outraged over public breastfeeding, and yet this is somehow acceptable?
Come at me, brah!
Sweater puppies redux.
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Simon Cowell in London. (March 6, 2012)