“So I crammed the coke inside the condom with the gerbil inside. Let me tell you something: You have never experienced stimulation like that of a coked out gerbil up your ass”

“So I grabbed the tiger by the throat and squeezed out all it’s blood and that how I became the Adonis that stands before you now.”

She’s either brave, crazy or likes cocaine.

The Velveteen Hobbit

“See, if we hook up then I can say, I’m winning and you say, I’m Winnick.”

Elvis?!

Also known as the Blake Lively Improved.

I see this ending with cocaine, a stolen watch and a car in the bottom of a ravine.

I don’t know who Katheryn Winnick is but she must be one hell of an actress to be pretending that whatever Charlie Sheen is talking about is remotely interesting or amusing.

Look who’s gonna get fucked by Charlie tonight !

Charlie’s doing a helluva job channeling Robert Evans…

“That’s your pick-up line? It’s been a long time since you’ve talked to women that aren’t hookers huh?”

She has no idea what he’s saying…she just wants to know where to get those shoes on his shirt.

So I yelled out “Mr. Lennon!”, then I crouched down, took one shot that missed, and then pumped 4 hollow-points into his back and shoulder and it was “Goodnight funnyman!”.

“So maybe if you just put in a couple of small implants just to give them a bit more lift…”

Want! Hint: not Charlie.

She’s smiling at Charlie Sheen. This cannot end well.

Did Charlie pay her with cash, eftpos or credit card in order for her to make onlookers get the impression she was interested in his tales of banging 7 gram rocks?

That on his shirt was supposed to be a picture of a vagina.