“…. and then you go down on the shaft like THIS!”

I can’t tell if he has dementia or is just this way.

“I loved you in ‘Sex and the City’!”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa Kathy! Calm down! My reality show didnt even take off, so chill the fuck out for a second….geez”

and here i didn’t know LeAnn Rhimes and The Hoff were dating let alone having a lover’s quarrel.

I see the Hoff, but who’s the douchebag in the grey suit?

Jesus Christ, how drunk did that fucker get this time?

Are you sure Hasselhoff is not photo-bombing all this pic I see him in. I can’t imagine anyone following this guy…

I was right. It wasn’t a pap that took this pic.

I like him now. Anybody that don’t like horses, I don’t like.

Someone get that crazy animal away from the horse.

Sadly, his staff couldn’t convince David that he was not, in fact, spiritually channeling the horse’s father.

The horse has a higher IQ.

You just know the horse is thinking ” So this is what my ass looks like!”

Glock makes horses now? That’s an…uh…eclectic product line.

No, Sweetie, I haven’t been with another horse.

or

“I wanna kiss you, Suzy.”

“The maid needs to clean our mirrors this well at home! Hello!”

David was embarassed when he found out that he wasn’t sharing acting tips with Sarah Jessica Parker.

For the horse, it was a clear case of mistaken identity. He mistook a douchebag for a feedbag.

“Whoa! That’s not a hamburger!”

Whoa, wait, so are Kim Cattrall and the other crusty-vag’s joining Baywatch too?

“Dear god, Sarah Jessica Parker has gone crazy! Save me KITT!…Batman?…Hoffsicle? Shit.”