Connor Cruise at the Oakley Learn To Ride Fueled By Reboot event in Los Angeles. (August 24, 2013) -Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
excuse me for another 15 seconds….
Wow, she looks hot.
“Now the thing to remember is Xenu’s weakness is a paddle to the balls, which, coincidentally, if administered by John Travolta is how my dad spent every Tuesday afternoon.”
“You’re so hot. Watch, this is how my dad would react.”
Aww, that’s cute. He reacts to women the same way his dad does.
The perks of being Tom Cruise’s son. Well done Connor.
Sorry babe, you’re barking up the wrong tree. I’m a Cruise man!
Girl: RAPE! Help somebody! A black man is trying to rape me!
Cruise: Relax lady. I’m just trying to see if you need any help with your board.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa! I don’t want to scare you, but my dad says if you come any closer, I’ll get this horrible disease where my penis stiffens and I’ll want to put it in your vagina. And no one wants that, right?”
who is the black woman who Cruise impregnated, and then pretend-adopted his own son
somebody please sneak some dna samples and prove it
did grace jones pop that out?
Seriously, the boy is the spitting image of him, he is fooling no one.
There’s only one problem with this theory.
That Ireland Baldwin gets AROUND…
“All I asked you was Have you ever considered joining the completely legitimate religion of Scientology and you beat me off in the ocean…but not in the way I was hoping.”
KEEP YOUR GIRLY BITS AWAY FROM ME
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