superficial

  1. EricLR

    Okay, I see the child, but who’s the guy in the wheelchair?

  2. On the Ryan Seacrest effeminate meter, this guy (?) is probably a 9.5…

  3. JC

    Remember, Make-A-Wish kids: When you ask to meet a celebrity, you have to specify that you don’t want anyone from E!

  4. He smiled, knowing that he was secretly the cancer they were after. No doctor would ever cure him. No one would ever cure Seacrest.

  5. Seacrest is the real cancer here. He brought us the Kardashians. Burn in hell, asshole.

  6. rollingeyes

    ‘The Ryan Seacrest Hospital for Uncoordinated Giant Children’s Mid-Op Sex Change Recovery Wing’ must have been taken already.

  7. “Thank you Ryan, it is so nice of you to visit us, after giving us all AIDS.”

  8. I would never, ever have guessed that kid is a Martin Truex Jr. fan. Jeff Gordon, maybe – but never Truex.

  9. Hugh Jazz

    “And now meet our first contestant on American Idle.”

  10. cc

    He gets the last laugh….he’s had his hands on Julianne Hough’s naked ass a thousand times.

  11. “…*psst*….Now that I’ve convinced you, Juan, to get the sex change operation, it’s not exactly “gay” if we’re caught having butt sex, IS IT?!!”

  12. Why is the Seacrest Studios’ ribbing cutting ceremony being held inside the Levine’s Children’s Hospital? Was the morgue already taken?

  13. Booberry

    I really hope this person’s not resorted to pretending to be a sick kid just to meet Seacrest. If I’m gonna do something that is an automatic trip to hell. I better be meeting somebody better than that.

  14. MIRV

    I’m most sorry for the kid whose day Seacrest brightens.

    POOR SORRY BASTARD: “Oh wow, Ryan Seacrest is here, great!”

  15. i have no clue.

  16. Don’t you think this person has faced enough adversity already?

  17. Vladimir

    “Ryan’s Kids” are a lit-tle different than “Jerry’s Kids”…

  18. Seacrest: So what operation are you having done today?
    patient: I want to be a woman.
    Seacrest: Me too!

  19. “They told me Ryan Reynolds was showing up!”

  20. “ok yeah, what I really wanted was stem cells to cure my cancer, but hey…a calendar, some cheap earbuds, and a picture with a douchebag is good too. Thanks Make a Wish Foundation!”

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