1. JC

    “Mr. Sutherland, please stop head-butting my vagina and screaming ‘WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR?’ I work for you, remember?”

  2. Joe Blow

    “If you’re running from Jack Bauer, you’re already dead!”

    “Too right, sir, but you’re not Jack Bauer, you’re just a drunken celebrity.”

  3. He’s diffused 9 J├Ągerbombs and the sun isn’t even up yet.

  4. In the new porn “24 Inches,” Jack Blower has 24 hours to gobble 24 inches of dick or the terrorists win.

  5. Wrong caption.

    TOTALLY SOBER Kiefer Sutherland in London.

  6. “Chloe. CHLOE!?!”

  7. This man is to alcohol what Charlie Sheen is to cocaine.

  8. “Heyyyy you guys can’t do this to meeee….don’tcha know my Dad is…is the Prezdent of PANEM? So fuuuuck you.”

  9. JimBB

    Old gun.

  10. Swearin

    Keifer Sutherland, seen here being helped out of his limo by your local mayoral candidate and his personal assistant…

  11. Marketing Mike

    When they shut 24 down, it wasn’t because of the ratings.
    They couldn’t keep him sober. I guess nothing’s changed
    over the last 5 years.

  12. Vlad

    C’mon, Mr. Sutherland, let’s get you to your room.

    Too late, I’ll pay to clean your seats…and the carpet…and the ceiling…and your driver’s dry cleaning bill…I also took a dump in your glove box, but that one’s on you.

  13. “It’s just another version of the Heimlich maneuver.”

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