superficial

  1. Geez, Mila. You could have Instagrammed that bite.

  2. Batu Khan

    Come here, listen to your friends, eat chinese food… All I’m saying is later you better be sticking MY stick in your mouth!!!

  3. ThisWillHurt

    “You’re sure you’re pregnant.”
    “Yup.”
    “And you’re keeping it.”
    “Yup.”
    “How much am I going to pay in child support again?”
    “A lot.”
    “. . .”
    “If you so much as think about pushing me down the stairs, I’ll sue your dick off. OK, bitch? Now shut up and finish your orange chicken. And it’s your treat.”

  4. EricLR

    This reminds me of that sad moment in “500 Days of Summer.”
    You know, the moment that I realized I was watching “500 Days of Summer” for some fucking reason.

  5. Ashton thought bubble: How does is she able to pick up food with those two pencils?

  6. JungleRed

    Ever get to that point in a relationship where you can’t even stand watching them eat? He has.

  7. Krazee Thug Nutz

    Private male thought: “Now if she could only gobble my cock, like that dim sum.”

  8. Ashton’s at the stage where he can’t even hear her voice or see her face without wanting to hang himself or punch her in the face.

  9. pigglywiggly

    When your boyfriend gives you the OJ face, it’s probably time to pack.

  10. anonymous

    Ashton looks like he about two more boring dates away from hot-tubing with strange chicks the first chance he gets.

  11. WTF is wrong with this dude, $100 million dollars, good looks even if he is a douche and is dating Mila Kunis and still looks like he wants to kill himself.

  12. For every hot girl there’s a guy tired of fucking her.

  13. CK

    Take your hat off at the table, dipshit.

  14. JB

    ‘Damnit I should have gotten the sea bass’

  15. Ashton (thinking) “I’ve made a huge mistake.”

  16. George P Burdell

    Thought bubble: “I’d like to see that waitress bent over with her skirt up and her panties down.”
    Speech bubble: “Yes, dear.”

  17. What an ungrateful schmuck

  18. Swearin

    Mila Kunis is sticking wood into her mouth 2 feet away from him, and all he can think about is going home and banging one of his piles of money

  19. alexxx

    Is it me or does it look like someone is hiding under the table and stealing Ashton’s food?

  20. The following is a serious question: What is Chinese food in England like as compared to Chinese food in the USA? For that matter, how about the same question applied to Mexican food…

  21. Schadenfreude

    So that’s how you get Meg to shut up!

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