1. Dude, the paparazzi’s vision is not motion based, you douche!

  2. Johnny P!

    Justin: “Just… saw… real… art!… People… in.. room… better… dressed… than…me!… Some… of… them… younger!…. Some… more…. talented… some… richer!… Justin confused!”
    Jessica: “Oh, don’t be silly, JT! Let’s go clubbing, get shit-faced, and later I’ll let you snort coke off my ass! Everything’s gonna be fine! *giggle*”

  3. BlackAndWhite.Minstrel

    There’s your problem lady, your douchenozzle’s come right through the floor.

  4. Benny B

    pissed the paparazzi showed up bc he was just about to get a suckback

  5. dontkillthemessenger

    That’s his “I can’t believe I actually got engaged to this crazy chick… please let us get hit by a garbage truck” face.

  6. it had to be said

    “So, I’m sitting here with my penis out and the paps show up . . .”

  7. dani

    That’s a great impression of a hot dog.

  8. Pierce Bronzetan

    His next song is called “I’m Bringin’ Planking Back.”

  9. I fucking love Jessica Biel

  10. Bigalkie

    This kid has a pretty good life

  11. waldo

    Pants off dance off.

  12. Grand Poobah

    I think I just ruined my cummerbund

  13. Grand Poobah

    the only thing hybrid is his date..

  14. *whispers* “Okay, now slowly, casually, make like you’re going to take a nap and put your face down there.”

  15. “Is there a dick in that box?”

  16. Jill Ess

    He just realized what the word “marriage” means.

  17. The Brown Streak

    Fuck! It’s Michael Bay! Why does he keep stalking me and calling me Shia?

  18. Crissy

    Did she just stick the finger in the stinky?

  19. cc

    Here, $20 for twice more round the block. C’mon, honey, bear down.

  20. “Oh, he’ll look at it, he knows who butters his bread…we’ll sit in this car until he does.”

  21. CranAppleSnapple

    This thing is just for show, like a Safety Man doll you use for the car-pool lane. The real JT is chained to a wall in her basement.

  22. “What if I just… oops, it’s out now. So… roadhead?”

  23. Pierce Bronzetan

    When discussing the new Prius, the chauffeur mistakenly thought he heard Justin say “It’s dick shift.”

  24. yeahh

    shes too good for him

  25. Joaquin ingles

    I think his balls finally dropped.

  26. tlmck

    “Just a couple more strokes”.

  27. EricLr

    Baby, I don’t mean to scare you, and don’t look down–but I think John Travolta is on the floorboard.

  28. Somebody’s getting ready for a blowjob on the way home.

  29. squishy

    “I so need some tacos right now Jess!”

  30. “What. Have. I. Done.”

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