Dude’s still cool in a corduroy suit.

He killed three terrorists on his way there–or, as we call them, “homeless men.”

“I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for a producer, I can tell you I don’t have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you give me money now, that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you. ”
A quote often misattributed to Liam Neeson, but actually from Lindsay Lohan talking to a director.

“Hey Liam! Did you invent Cup of Noodles? I love Cup of Noodles! I survived on those things in college! What’s your favorite flavor? I like the shrimp! And the beef! And the chicken! Tell me more about Cup of Noodles!”

“Spare change?”
“I can tell you right now that I don’t have money. But what I do-”
“God, just say no next time.”

“Come on Liam, piss your pants for the camera. Come on, you do it for everyone else. Just a little dribble spot, please ? “

Clearly struck out with Rihanna the other day.

Allah said “… thou shall not wear Horizontal stripes on Mondays.”

“I can’t fuckin’ believe this…these arseholes get me up in the middle of the fuckin’ night, drag me hung-over ass to this stuffy shit-hole of a studio, refuse to stop at the pub or the liquor store for a hair of the dog, and now they want me to sign autographs for smelly old grandmas schleppin’ their snot-nosed grand kids…why didn’t I become a fuckin’ mechanic?”