superficial

  1. Cock Dr

    It’s a decent strategy – poof up the hair to amazing heights = distraction from horse face.

  2. Deacon Jones

    {coughs neon green blood}
    “Whhat the FFucK arrre YOU?”

  3. If she trots well, she’s a sure thing for Best in Show.

  4. It had to be said

    I think this is what it would look like if you were to crossbreed a horse and a (male) lion.

  5. F C U K, I had her to show at the Derby, not win.

  6. She needs another 12 inches of hair puff if she wants to make THAT face look short….

  7. So she is the new spokes model for Mane N Tail?

  8. MisterSuccint

    Is that… is that hair gel?

  9. HumpinFrog

    And the pony she named, Wildfire
    Busted down it’s stall
    and married a man
    who likes balls

  10. Turd Ferguson

    The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe.
    (All at once.)

  11. Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thundercats!

  12. guy rossi

    Tell me Christopher Walken isn’t weird now

  13. eskwire

    I know it’s old now, but the phrase “KILL IT!! KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!” had to be originally uttered to be used on this day.

  14. Militia

    All that Derby running, and her mane STILL has not calmed down…

  15. she is auditioning to play Medusa from The Inhumans. And here i thought the hair would be CGIed

  16. Cheryl Cole’s hairstyle called. It wants you to stop embarrassing yourself by copying girls half your age and 50 times prettier than you.

  17. Sodomy_Is_For_Girls

    It’s like Michael Knight stuck his head out the window and put a bra on to create the illusion of…Nah, this shit is just wrong.

  18. direchef

    Barbara Streisand and Sid Vicious swore they flushed that baby.

  19. baron of all media

    Whatever car this dog was in must’ve been driving awful fast.

  20. RebelMinion

    Did she just walk out of a wind tunnel?

  21. The Lion King 4: Trans-Simba is going to suck.

  22. Deacon Jones

    I think this whole SJP thing should go up there with the JFK asassination.

    I’ve never seen a bigger conspiracy among the media and entertainment industry to try to convince us of something that simply isn’t true; That we should give a shit about SJP and anything she does.

  23. Devo

    In the theme of bringing back childhood stuff from the 80s (Ghostbusters, Bill & Ted, etc.), Sarah Jessica Parker has landed the starring role in the remake of “My Little Pony: The Movie.”

  24. sexyman48

    “Come to the award show in a convertible they said…”

  25. KC

    The horse face, big hair and botoxed face still aren’t enough to distract me from the man arms.

  26. Colin

    Y,know, my cousin and I were just talking about how they need to make a Hocus Pocus 2.

  27. dontlooknow

    God I hate that broad.

  28. Mumbler

    Chewbacca now prefers to be known now as Becca.

  29. Asoto

    Jesus, this horse can run really fast!

  30. ollie tamland

    I’m am inexplicably drooling for a mint julep. Damn you Fish and your Pavlovian stimuli!

  31. oermens

    She looks like the real version of how she would look on south park. if that makes sense.

  32. Babs

    I keep expecting a squirrel to jump out of there.

  33. mike

    ridley scott’s gonna need to cast a Queen for Alien 5 one of these days…

  34. Mac

    I definitely missed Tammy Faye…

  35. Johnny99

    So that’s what a horse would look like if you put a Sarah Jessica Parker wig on it.

  36. ChonchArcola

    not matter what she has done with her “career”,she will always be the dorky girl from Square Pegs.

  37. tlmck

    Despite the face, I have always found her doable. Have not seen the body lately, but it used to be pretty tight.

  38. mfbinc

    hopefully this will bring big hair back……..cause the hairstyles all you chicks wear for the last ten years, boring as fuck!

  39. Choochoo

    Tempted to throw in a “Little John” joke but it looks like she’s had her turn with all the merry men.

  40. Sin

    Why do the magazines keep calling her pretty? She is one of the homeliest people I have ever seen. Other than her role in the movie with Bette Midler where they play witches, she is a downright pathetic actress.
    No talent, disgusting face, skeletor hands and feet and obnoxious on top of that.

  41. kimmykimkim

    Oh.my.hair.’The fuck?

  42. So, a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, “why the big hair?”

  43. fooey

    i don’t get how this is happening

  44. Turd Ferguson

    Opening for Poison and Cinderella at the Hollywood Bowl.

  45. That’s a full mane.

  46. Ismoss

    You cant polish a turd.

  47. UnholyKrep

    Fright Wig in the City.

  48. is she headed off to ask the wizard for some courage?

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