Gary Shirley at Teen Mom Amber Portwood's house in Anderson, IN. (March 26, 2011)
Well, that would explain why his face is bleeding.
Meth Scabs: Now in Lardass size!
That’s either blood or barbque sauce. Either one makes since.
Now I get it.
or cents, scents, sintz………..have some fucking sympathy for the home schooled.
He’s obviously a masochist. I mean, those tits have got to hurt flopping around with no bra on.
There’s no way he could move fast enough for flopping to occur.
You know it’s a problem when they can’t even fit you in the whole camera frame
Did they get a photo of the hole they cut in the wall so he could exit?
He’s so enormous his face is starting to split open.
Wow, whale wars is going all out this season.
“…and Leon’s getting LARGER.”
I’ll see your “Airplane” and raise you a:
“Oh Shit! It’s Mr Creosote!”
…”and dont call me Shirley” oh wait that IS his name
Behold the master of the “Jowl Scowl”.
How this thing ever convinced a female to spread her legs should go down as the 8th Wonder of the World.
Being 7th generation extra chromosome white trash, Gary knew that after getting laid once, there was no need to keep up his physique…he had already defied all odds.
“Hey Amber, I’m fat, ugly, greasy, and retarded. You’re fat, ugly, greasy, and retarded. We’re each other’s only hope.”
Amber must not have a very high opinion of herself. as in, “I’m a stupid cunt who deserves to be fncked by a stupid fat greasy ugly redneck for being such a whore.”
Was his head that shape before he got fat, or is his personal gravity pulling his face off?
You are on a roll today Smackup.
That diamondillium earring really classes up his image.
Dude, I love you
Gimli trimmed the beard, huh.
Excuse me miss…do you have this T-shirt in “choke a fat bastard” size?
I guess being unable to turn your neck trains you to have the eye tracking ability of a gecko.
seriously…this dude is fat.
Amber’s looking a lot cuter these days.
Wait, what do you mean “That’s Gary?”
I thought he recently died stuck to his La-Z-boy… Wrong guy?
hah! nice one!
How the hell does someone with no discernible jawline have a chinstrap beard?!?
“Nobody makes Boba Fett bleed his own blood. NOBODY!!”
Wow, sorry, let me rephrase:
“Nobody makes Jabba bleed his own blood. NOBODY!”
(Sorry, I’m an internet commenter, not a nerd.)
Is there a difference?
…that was the point. I hate when I have to explain my replies to comments that I fuck up.
Solo! Hay lapa no ya, Solo!
I’m trying to understand how this guy could actually impregnate a woman. I figure he was sitting on the toilet in the dark, Amber came in to pee and sat on him.
Oooooooo, a diamond earring. That’s proof right there that you can’t polish a dog turd.
OMG is that blood on his face?! nope, just ketchup. NOM NOM NOM
Fashion and health – these are my priorities.
Maybe he’s bleeding because he tried to stick his diamond stud in his cheek before deciding on his jugular.
Here’s a tip. A beard is no substitute for a jawline, no matter how you trim it..
Wasn’t he in “Stir Crazy” with Richard Pryor and Gene Wilder?
WTF, did his fat absorb his ear lobes?
Did he eat the baby???
There’s nothing to see here. I didn’t just eat the baby.
We probably aren’t giving Gary enough credit, by fucking Amber he figured out a way to be The Biggest Loser without dieting or exercise.Good for him!
He reminds me of Dating Site Murderer.
I think Gary is already taking after Mike The Situation, before the Surgeon General gives her approval. All he have to do now is get the Gym, Tan and Laundry part…
At least we’re assured that for one week Kevin Federline won’t be the fattest bastard on this site.
It is amazing how good the panorama feature on the Olympus cameras really works? Using it,they managed to get over half of “Jabba the Hut” in the frame.
A wild Snorlax appears.
Jabba the Hut and Jabba the Slut had a kid!
You know, it’s the little things that really complete an enemble. The ketchup, chinstrap, and earring would be all for nought if it wasn’t for the yellow pits on his shirt.
He’s pregnant with retardation
Man, I’m not the best looking guy in the world, but this jack off looks like the kind of guy who RAPES date rapists.
Next year, he is going to be on ‘The Biggest Loser’. No, I mean ‘The BIGGEST LOSER’.
Fish, close the thread. McFeely has won.
no way, this picture is a goldmine…gotta let it run it’s course. He’s like a muse for “hateful internet quips”.
It’s like he’s putting landmarks on his face so he can tell where the parts are supposed to be. The beard, the earring, the barbecue sauce…
What happened to him wanting to lose 100 pounds? I think he meant “gain 100 pounds” instead.
Nothing like some big huge inbred Jabba the Hutt motherfucker to really showcase the white trash ideal in this country.
At least he got a haircut after he got off that island.
Now he can star on the Biggest Loser. Oh wait, he already was. MTV called it Teen Mom.
I had no idea prison food tasted so good.
So now Amber returned the favor by knocking him up?
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