1. Dear, could you put that in my vagina.

  2. “I get to use it too, right, dear?”

    “Back off, wench.”

  3. George P. Burdell

    The Royal “Ass to Ass”

  4. Hugh G. Rection

    Will, does it vibrate?

  5. fred

    “Well, yes William, it would be wonderful if it was closer to that size. Since we are playing the ‘wonderful if’ game, it would also be nice if you had less hair on your back and more on your head.”

  6. Marketing Mike

    Somewhere, John Hamm is smiling…

  7. joe

    This is what happens when folks watch the Pam and Tommy Lee sex tape.

  8. This is how you hold it Kate.

  9. Really...?

    “Darling, this is just like when Pippa has popped over to pick up loose coinage from the floor yet again. In her skyscraper heels.”

  10. Ripley's Believe It Or Not

    “If only it was still alive, I could show it how to appear as a human.”

  11. PassingTrue

    I bought this from the dark skinned gentleman over there. He called it a trouser snake.

  12. This is their life. Until they die.

    • Ripley's Believe It Or Not

      The orgies at a different billion dollar venue every night and copious amounts of virgin’s blood they always have on tap I’m sure make up for any daytime dreariness.

  13. Um… Which end do we smoke?

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