superficial

  1. BlackAndWhiteMinstrel

    What is the sound of one gerbil choking?

  2. Where’s Chris Hansen where you need him???? Oh right, he’s right here…

  3. I can only assume Orangina is a beverage made with the refreshing flavor of Orangutan vagina.

  4. I was going to make a crack about Gere writing BonBons on the box because the little prince didn’t like his drawings of them.

    But then I realized you illiterate cretins would never get the joke.

    • DeucePickle

      That’s only kinda true. I mean, come on, I’ve seen the cover of that book you’re talking about. Still waiting for the movie to come out.

  5. dontkillthemessenger

    Alexander Skarsgard pulled out of the commercial at the last minute.

  6. cagster

    “Well, hello there young orphan….”

  7. Contusion

    Where do casting directors manage to find these oddball looking little kids that come off as “cute” at age 6 but look like the offspring of Sasquatch at 23?

  8. “Hey kid, where do they keep the rodents in this zoo?”

  9. irocksocksoff

    “You ever seen a grown man naked?”

  10. Aw, man… now I gotta sell my windowless white van AND stop drinking Orangina. This has turned out to be a shitty Tuesday.

  11. pretty vacant

    survival in the wild rule # 1b:
    if you cant find a gerbil, improvise.

  12. navvet

    Joey,
    do you like gladiator movies

  13. Bondo Your Face

    “Excuse me, would you like to help me stay relevant?”

  14. George P Burdll

    Jerry Sandusky told me I should start a charity for you.

  15. Swearin

    Unfortunantly, Sir Ian McKellan was too late to stop his past self from kidnapping little Timmy.

  16. “Golly, kid, pedophile is an awfully big word for a 7 year old!”

  17. King Diamond

    What an ugly kid.

  18. TheNudeGuy

    I want to stick her vagina on my penis

  19. Rob

    “No, I’m the one with the dead gerbils in my rectum. Rod Stewart is the one that had to get semen pumped from his stomach. but its a common mistake… think Gere – gerbil, Stewart – semen.”

  20. Buddy the Elf

    So a Japanese company is filming a commercial in France.
    With a gay American. Yeah okay, makes me want to buy the stuff.

  21. Creepiest Sad Keanu spinoff ever.

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