Not shown: Lindsay stealing the spare tire out of the trunk

That’s the face of a man who knows this is gonna be the worst threesome ever.

(Is this what it takes to get a blowjob from her now days?)

Warren’s expression is well known to any husband who’s wife ever started a discussion with: Honey, she seems so down. We should help. What do you think?

Samantha’s upset because a unicorn took a dump on her head.

“Hey, Parrot Head, go sleep in the back of someone else’s parked car, or I’ll call Lindsay and tell her you are sleeping naked and horny on top of a pile of cocaine and jewelry.”

The eyes are saying, ‘This will not end well.’

So a lesbian, a hottie, and a has-been all get in a car.

I forget the punchline, but Lohan’s a whore.

“We’re getting Take out. Do you want anything?”
“Bearded clam.”
“I don’t think Long John Silvers has that on the menu.”

“If you ask me ‘Are we there yet?’ one more time, no pussy for a month! Understood?”

It’s just like Jessica to take in a stray dog.

Jessica kept wondering why the car behind her kept flashing its headlights but when she realized the truth it was too late.

Meanwhile inside Cash’s head ‘Don’t make a scene, remember, it’s Jessica you get to fuck later.’

I’m really hoping that fugly is not contagious. Jessica is really taking a chance here.

“I think Sam’s looking at the map now. Hey, Ronson, what do your elven eyes see?”

Is the implication here that Ronson’s going to get a chance to eat Jessica Alba’s pussy? Well that proves it…there is no God!