The only words that can come out of my mouth right now are “what a fucking tool”. I’m not a violent person by nature but this picture makes me want to punch him in the balls. Fucking.Tool.

Can people stop paying this guy to host parties so he can start hosting at Applebee’s like he was always fated to do?

Move: Weston Cage paparazzi karate demo

These tools time is almost over and the best part is they have zero talent or skills so there is no chance of them turning up and doing concerts in malls or reunion shows like the Backstreet Boys or any other boy bands.

… So then they asked me if I was flexible, and I was like, of course I’m fucking flexible, I’m the Situation. I dunno what that has to do with baseball though… anyhow, they hired me as their new catcher on the spot!

are we fucking done with this guy and his band of herpes-laden umpa-lumpas yet?

What a choice, does one go to his party or Kim’s? Doesn’t really matter, whichever one you go to will prominently feature a giant ass.

Weston Cage is looking a lot dorkier these days.

what a feeling!

So this is what it looks like to jump the shark.

Pissed off, The Situation tries to explain why they misspelled Shateau.

Jesus, he still exists?

Move: Charm necklace twistabout.

Well, I guess if we do inspect his crotch from *this close* we might find something…

Move: Riverdance Crotch Whistle

It looks like he’s wearing pajama jeans.

Imitation is the highest form of douche baggery.

“I should have thrown that bannana peel farther away. If only I could evolve…”

I thought he was dead. Seriously.

Muhfucker can’t even goose-step right.

I’m pretty sure it’s easy to kick like this when your balls have shriveled up into a small mass of gonorrhea

Just how many moron sons does Nick Cage have?

IDK why but I totally want to bend him over and introduce him to a new situation!

Glad those Pajama Jeans are working out for him!