Cool mascara bro!

“It’s not mascara! It’s Hawkeye-liner!”

maybe she’s born with it.
maybe it’s maybelline!

Gay midget.

Under all that makeup is a guy who couldn’t get a part in a Pizza Hut commericial.

Promo still from “Fun House Mirror Nightmares.”

That hairline means one of two things. Either he has a hormone problem or he’s a monkey.

“I still can’t figure out how I knocked that chick up…”

He would make a good Count Dracula with a face like that.

He looks like every composite sketch for a criminal that I’ve ever seen.

Still pitching for that liberace biopic then…

Little face, big head

Even though I am a straight guy, I put him first on the list of guys in Hollywood I would not fuck.

I imagine this head having a Dinklage body.

Straight as a rainbow.

Hollywood…where guys that look like this get laid.

The steely gaze of a man in his sexual and physical prime. Never has there been, or will be again, a man in such perfect condition. His eyes scan the awaiting crowd with the dedication and commitment of a man who knows what he wants and is determined to get it….

Peanut M&M’s.

Say what you want, I totally would.

Too bad he’s gay.