superficial

  1. Body of Jessica Simpson circa 2009. Face of the witch from Army of Darkness.

  2. Bonky

    All the Jenny Craig in the world can’t do a thing for that face.

    • lily

      or the body…

      • Dick Hell

        Think of her poor dance partner, trying to make all her flab move in the same direction while struggling to maintain some (any) kind of grip while the dance floor groans beneath them and her mustache stubble lacerates his face.

  3. Frank Burns

    Left hand: brunch, right hand: lunch.

  4. rawfodog

    She used to be a Vulcan, now she looks like a Klingon.

  5. Cock Dr

    The ravages of extreme yo-yo dieting have left her face looking like a deflated beige balloon.
    On the other hand she’s sporting an awesome rack.
    Good luck tiny dancer.

    • DeucePickle

      Yeah pretty sweet rack, but that is definitely a face you can say, “Never had plastic surgery, all natural.”
      Maybe it’s time to break that trend.

  6. That little hollow in her abdomen isn’t her belly button. It’s where the doctors insert the lipo tube every month.

  7. Something about “young Skywalker”, “two bags full of ribs”, and a “fully armed and operational battle station”. I’d piece it together if it weren’t for these meds…

  8. The outfit says 20 the face says times 4.

  9. rawz9volt

    The look on her face indicates that she can smell the friction of her thighs.

  10. Mary Feeney

    She looks like an R. Crumb cartoon.

  11. Like a tube sock full of rocks …

  12. I’d hit it.

    /after I smoke a bowl and a 6 pack

  13. This is trip one carrying lunch and brunch, not shown, the next 10 trips.

  14. Ms. Alley? Would you please sign this photo from when you didn’t look grotesque? It’s for my daughter.

  15. Mickey01232000

    This outfit will soon be sold at KMart with the word Goodyear written on the side of it.

  16. Joe

    I make the same face when I see her.

  17. Minky Wail

    Not seen: A homeless Shelly Long pumping fix-a-flat into a Rebecca Howe voodoo doll.

  18. cc

    Someone there is a bridge with an ‘Immediate Occupancy’ sign on it.

  19. It looks like Homer Simpson’s face under that dress.

  20. Just because you have a gravitational orbit does not make you a star.

  21. lori

    She is definitely a voluptuous woman, kind of gorgeous in a way.

  22. Carolyn

    Good god.

  23. Gotta rush back to feed Hansel and Gretel.

  24. That face says “Physically strenuous dancing no where near a buffet? The things I’ll do for money.”

  25. joho777

    Kirstie desperately need Photoshop done on her stomach and legs. And she really really needs her makeup!

  26. Ms. Swan

    She look like a man.

  27. some jerk

    This is indistinguishable from a 50 year-old man in drag.

  28. I think she might be sort of fun. And I’d love to examine her chesticles. Just for scientific purposes, you know.

  29. Bigalkie

    This could be… What the scientologists pray to. Xenu

  30. Tidbit

    Her plump ass isn’t all that bad.

    As to why it’s on her left kneecap is the true question.

  31. Pat C.

    I’ve forgotten – was she ever pretty?

  32. little turtle head

    Looks like Banner took Starks advice and suited up…

  33. Martina

    See? She endorses Romney and everything goes to hell

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