1. it had to be said

    Clue number one that it was water and not vodka in that bottle: Hoff is is not consuming it.

  2. “What’s this 80 proof shit? I said 120, dammit!”

  3. “And this is what it looks like when they shoot in on your face but keep your mouth open. You get used to the taste if you gargle with peroxide for a week.”

  4. Frank The Duck

    David Hasselhof seen swallowing a massive aspirin to try and ward off his hangover while standing on the podium and spraying water at the crowd after the Dom Perignon drinking contest…

  5. Cock Dr

    It makes perfect sense that the Irish would lap this kind of entertainment right up.

  6. Willie Dixon

    After the Gay Matrix, Hoff got used to squirting while having something white in his mouth.

  7. Richard McBeef

    Is that a marshmallow in his mouth?

    Raise your hand if you played Pudgy Bunny.

  8. Seen: Hasselhoff slinging a bottle of his own urine at someone.

    Not seen: Kim Kardashian in the audience, front row center.

  9. dontkillthemessenger

    Where’s his trusty squeegee?

  10. kris

    “performing” what exactly? anyone?

  11. Perplexity

    How dare someone insult that belt buckle?

  12. Snack pack

    Trig Palin: circa 2066.

  13. AnnaDraconida


  14. The Brown Streak

    No! No! No! You’re supposed to sit in the chair, and pull the cord, and all the water will fall on you!

  15. DeucePickle

    If it’s not Cris’, it’s piss !

  16. First the cheesburgers. Now this.

  17. “hey you kids …. get off my lawn!”

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