“Oh sorry sir. When we heard there would be a Seal on board, we just assumed it was…oh, never mind.”
You are on a roll…
“What do you mean ‘Fetch the captain his dinner and draw him a bath’?”
Wait! What do you mean you asked for a seal to swim next to the boat for tourists?!… No, I don’t want a fish!
“No, stop worrying, it isn’t contagious. Yeah, I get that all the time.”
The one thing the survivors always mention is that the Somalian pirates are very polite
$10 says they think he’s one of the new waiters.
Explaining to him why this doesn’t make him a navy seal.
Seal: You got the memo about not touching my cameras, right?
Crew: Yes sir.
Seal: Good because the last bitch just wouldn’t listen and I had to divorce her.
“And now, gentlemen, if one of you will kindly direct me to the engine room, I can get right to work…”
WHICH ONE OF YOU TOUCHED MY STUFF!!!
I tea-bagged your drum set.
“is everybody white on this ship?”
“You mean the only blonde on this ship is that guy, right there, in the middle???”
“Wanna know how I got these scars?”
Let me guess – he was a clubbed baby Seal?
Sailor: “Welcome aboard Seal. I’m a huge fan of your music.”
Seal: “I’m sorry. you caught me off guard by not saying something racist or stupid.”
No shit. It’s France… I think they may have seen one or two black people before.
Of course they’ve seen black people in France – they’ve been running ‘What’s Happening’ in syndication over there for years!
Hey Hey Hey!
Finally he can be a Navy Seal.
Guess he’s done with women..
“Do you need help?”
“You poor thing…who clubbed you?”
Sprechen Sie Deutsch?
“Excuse me Captain, where da white beotches at?’
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Seal boarding a yacht in France. (August 13, 2012) -Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN