1. Johnny P!

    “Describe my new fragrance? Well… let’s see… it has base notes of musk, middle notes of citrus, and a top note of BIG TITS!!! Line-up starts on the left, folks…”

  2. Insert a quarter and it spits out a fortune card.

  3. Frank Burns

    The new fragrance is called “Anonymous” and is for women who want to smell like somebody no one has ever heard of.

  4. kelly


  5. Contusion

    It gives you the ability to write while looking in another direction.

  6. Very time I see this woman’s breast I think Talosians.

  7. “It smells like dumbfounded.”

  8. Codot

    “Sign it to ‘Boobs’? Wow! You’re like the twentieth guy I met with that name!”

  9. The Pope

    “Please make it out to John…Phillip…Paul…Gregory…Thomas….Dennis…um…Howard…Michael…I’m Amish, lotta names y’know…Matthew…Stephen…Paul…oh I said that one already?”

    • Johnny P!

      I don’t know why you keep getting “thumbs down” for this comment.
      I actually find it really funny…

  10. lily

    thousand yard stare….clearly there ain’t much goin up upstairs…

  11. RobN

    Permanent duck lips aren’t attractive.

  12. cc

    The fragrance that asks…’Is that your Ferrari parked out front?’

  13. SW

    A subtle fragrance combining the hypnotizing aromas of shame and the lack of a father’s love (smells like Jack Daniels and cigarettes).

  14. Georgia

    In the porn version of Three’s Company, she got stuck playing Mrs. Roper

  15. mean_gurl

    Smells like…SKANK.

  16. Twenty pounds of baloney in two five-pound bags.

  17. Interesting, well-seasoned, and provocative!

  18. I actually thought it was Katie Price.

  19. I would wrect that, boob veins and all. I would love to see those melons swing back and forth as I lay the pipe.

  20. Persistent Cat

    Does the newspaper still put out colour comics on the weekend? Because I’d like to roll her on them and give her a Marmaduke tattoo.

  21. When I saw this picture, I thought Aubrey O’Day got everything fixed in one swoop. Then I realized I was looking at someone even less famous.

  22. FLanlManl

    Ugly mouth- uck. She looks like she would look better without whatever she had done.

  23. Jack Ketch

    Real eyeballs, everything else fake … the lips, the tits, the cheekbones. The IQ of a mushroom ?

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