superficial

  1. He’s lost a couple of inches…

  2. He’s half the man he used to be.

  3. His face says he’s happy to be taking home the award, but disappointed that his penis won.

  4. angerinside

    What do you mean he looks tired. Jesus carried around less wood for a couple of hours and it killed him.

    (meet ya in hell fish)

  5. Here’s John at the ESPY Awards. Now re-pronounced after a Mexican grounds person looked at his crotch and screamed “Ai ai ai! Look aye espy a snake een his zeeper!”

  6. “ESPYs? I thought this was the HIGH TIMES awards? Fuuuuuuuck.”

  7. did his penis get an ESPY award?

  8. When John Hamm gets a boner, the imbalance of blood rushing out of the rest of his body gives him the tards.

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