1. “[Takes deep breath] Smells like it just came off the assembly line…”

  2. j-man

    Tom was crazy for dumping her.

  3. So, apparently as a man, you have the choice of aging into a fat slob or a tiny lesbian woman. I’m going with fat slob.

  4. He’s a little bit country.

  5. dontkillthemessenger

    Let me just turn the knob back here and she’ll be up and running in no time.

  6. Gee honey your armpit smells like……… Vodka, I love you.

  7. Donald Sterling

    We’ve secretly replaced Keith’s wife with a store mannequin. Let’s watch and see if he notices…

  8. Flatliner

    Talk about a bitch…already taller than him and still has to wear high heels that are taller than his lifts.

    • How in the name of all that is holy is raising boobs to chin level a bad thing? She’s lining herself up to give him a perfect landing.

  9. PassingTrue

    She has skills in Urban development.

  10. Little Tongue

    She obviously likes them short.

  11. It turns out 45 year old cans smell pretty good.

  12. How does he not feel emasculated standing next to her?

    • I’m short, and I used to have a girlfriend who was taller than me. I loved it cuz when we were walking together I could hear other guys thinking That dude must be hung like a mule.

  13. Nicole is still pretty hot.

  14. Bonky

    Baby, I thought we had a long talk about you wearing heels !

  15. Nicole and Ellen make a cute couple

  16. Cap'n Obvious

    Frail amazonian botox freak and her cross-dressing bi-friendly pocket toy.

    Props to these two for saving two other people from these bullets.

  17. “There are the fucking keys…”

  18. Marketing Mike

    I’m 6′ and I dated a girl 6’4″ once. Plus, she wore heels.
    Honestly, nothing like leaning over into a nice set of tits.
    He’s got something here, seriously, I’d go on that ride.
    Nicole is still hotter than 90% of the girls her age.
    Be honest, would you pick Gwenny over this?
    I rest my case.

  19. “Smells like middle-age spirit.”

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