superficial

  1. “I was hoping I might find you here, Potter. You’re far too inquisitive to remain among the living.”

  2. Has anyone seen my man purse? Anyone?

  3. He’s like a fucked-up St. Bernard.

    • cc

      I was just going to say…he’s got a hip flask of vodka in there in case he runs into Lindsay Lohan or vice versa.

  4. Is that drugged-out, brain-dead fuck-potato actually wearing a purse around his neck? Is that actually what’s happening in that photo?

    Because, if so, I believe that creates a loophole in English Common Law by which any random motorist can run him over without fear of prosecution or public opprobrium.

  5. EricLR

    Jeez, do they have to make him wear a collar? Couldn’t they just chip him?

  6. Boot polish? Nope – never heard of such a thing.

  7. This is how you wear a fanny pack when you have a big ass head.

  8. Did he steal Sarah Jessica Parker’s feed bag?

  9. Jenn

    At least robbers won’t have to touch his ass region to steal his wallet. Yay for them.

  10. Poor Mickey. Despite the fact that we are now in the 21st century, he’s still can’t quite get the grasp of wearing fanny packs.

  11. journalschism

    Wow. From an Arc Reactor in the chest to this?

  12. On the set of the latest Beethoven movie…

  13. …the result of too many blows to the head.

  14. heroinstripper

    “does anyone have jumper cables? No, I mean really. Anyone have jumper cables?”

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