1. “Originally I wanted to use 2 pistols, but that would be harder to explain. So I settled on a shotgun.”

  2. “I left a hole in his face thiiiis big.”

  3. The only seminar she’s qualified to speak at is one devoted to STDs or endlessly profiting off the death of your spouse.

  4. Spleen

    Not seen: whatever device was used to prop her up.

  5. JimBB

    “…and that is why you never mix heroin with meth.”

  6. “For starters, le Fuck both of you.”

  7. “I miss Curt more than anybody. I would have never wished him to do harm to himself. We were like this!”

  8. Just sayin....

    She probably shaved off her eyebrows off
    right after cutting her hair. It’s the next step.

  9. “i can go without heroin for this long”

  10. Yes, yes. We all know how big your vagina is.

  11. “…and then I held the shotgun about this far away…”

  12. I once had a sawed-off this big, but then the police seized it as evidence.

  13. Kim chi

    His pink noodle was this long…

  14. You must be at least this big to ride Courtney…I mean, unless you just want to side-wall it.

  15. “I didn’t murder Kurt but if I had, here’s how I would have done it…”

  16. donkeylicks

    The Walking Dead spinoff is surprisingly looking pretty good.

  17. “If I can teach OJ how to get away with murder, I can teach you.”

  18. cc

    ‘I once did a line of coke this long.’

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