The instant he hears her personalized ring tone
I’d like to imagine his ring tone is the Imperial march from Star Wars…
…the spasms happen several times every day, whenever he remembers he’s married to tori spelling.
Tell me about the time you banked that one chick when your wife was home taking care your four kids.
Hey kid, give McDermott your hoodie—it goes with his posture.
You wouldn’t be walking too well if you just tried to fuck a Victoria’s Secret mannequin, either.
He is doing an impression of his wife’s wonky tits.
Hey Dean, what’s your defense for cheating on Tori Spelling?
“Hey, Dad, any idea which skanky ho you’re going to bang next?”
“Eh, whichever one says yes.”
So, he has finally mastered the vaunted “Iveski Stratagem”?
This stretch is designed to create a matching his/hers gaping hole in the middle of the chest.
“Four words: Can you blame me?”
“Hold up, Dad are you having a stroke?”
“what? No!.. No, your mom just asked me into the dressing room… she wanted my opinion on which bra I liked the best.”
Gee, Tori is going to be really pissed that your stroke hit when the reality tv cameras weren’t rolling.
Court Ordered Chastity Sleeve Activated
So let me get this straight, he puts his dick an chick who looks like an aborted horse fetus with a wonky pair of bolt-ons and now he’s worthy of a picture credit?
Surgeon General’s warning: Being married to Tori Spelling can cause strokes.
Looks like he started to make a run for it and Tori yanked on the fishing line.
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