1. The Critical Crassness

    Nice to see Madam Toussand’s finally got a wax figure that closely resembles the star.

  2. It had to be said

    So, who brought the vodka? KIT, you there?

  3. Bucky Barnes

    David Hasselhoff… Saville Row’d Warrior. Now please excuse him while he eats a hamburger off the floor…

  4. sparkymcgee

    “Britain’s got Talent”

    Not since you landed at Heathrow David.

  5. ….and J.C. Penny’s has their new mensware model

  6. R. Hawk

    I thought Regis retired.

  7. David Hasselhoff launching a talent show is like Jessica Simpson kicking off a weight loss competition. At the end of the day, hamburgers will be eaten off the floor.

  8. A’rright who gots my cheeseburger?

  9. Marley B.

    The Hoff says, “If my finger guns don’t get you, my laser eye will….pffft!”

  10. homosapiens

    Helloooo ladies, No, I don’t have an erection that starts at my knew, but, yes, I am happy to see you.

  11. homosapiens

    dammit, i meant knee

  12. Jovy

    “Pew Pew!”

  13. cc

    Get yourself a burger there, fuckface.

  14. fake fonk


  15. Maggie

    And the burger was THIS BIG…

  16. Wait, this isn’t the American version? I got replaced by Howie Fucking Mandel?

  17. Elle

    pew! pew!

  18. Cock Dr

    That’s a big bottle of hair gel he’s smuggling down the trouser leg.
    I guess a man must always be prepared for stylin’.

  19. MisterSuccint

    I can carry a case of Scotch with just these two fingers on each hand. Then I can make the full bottles empty in just 24 hours. My liver and my career are immune to alcohol.

  20. Steelerchick

    “I’m a homo!!! “

  21. “excuse me ma’am….can I smell your feet? No? Then it must be your pussy”

  22. Dick

    You may think what you think, but you wish you had the pussy he’s had. And the money.

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