We see this a lot. Has Posh been checked for crabs?

doing his best ‘John Hamm’

It’s stops itching if you shower.

Not the most stealthy way to hide a boner, but whatever works.

Excuse me sir, are you bending it like Beckham?

“Testicle…one, two…testicle…one, two”

Oop…wait…my penis is still there. Why did you ask?

Seriously dude, go see a doctor about that shit.

Hands on the ball – that’s a penalty shot.

he knows there’s cameras on him all the time, that adjustment must be muy importante. er, tres important.

“Monsieur, Vous need to see le doctore. You are starting to geet ze reputation most strange.”