superficial

  1. dontkillthemessenger

    I have to make sure you’re not wearing a wire before I discuss my ex-wife.

  2. “Thank you for your service in the Boer War.”

  3. Charles – “Get back father, the medal’s not for you.”

  4. JimBB

    “Yes, excuse me, but I do believe this man is dead.”

    “No he’s not! He’s just resting.”

  5. Mohawk Disco

    And they really believed you cared? You get a medal and a cookie just for that!

  6. Little Tongue

    “We’re gonna cut your heart out and eat it raw, with some fava beans and nice chianti.”
    “…”

  7. cc

    Christmas future, I bequeath to thee this medal for spending 20 more years waking up beside Camila Parker-Bowles.

  8. You know, I think you are a little too old for this kind of procedure but if we just start you off with some b-cups right about here, that should work.

  9. Dox

    “Medal or nap….. Eh, Ill do both.”

  10. “Is this ribbon felt ? Ha Ha it is now !”

  11. “Here is a medal for caring about others so the rest of us don’t have too…Now fuck off.”

  12. “I know it sounds crazy, but if you look closely at one of them in this area here, near the center of the chest, you’ll find something these commoners refer to as a heart.”

  13. “Look now, Camilla really digs you, you should ask her out.”

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