He was used for seed.
He’s never getting a ring on it. Never. And that’s ok….don’t feel bad for either one of ‘em.
You don’t need a ring to be happy when you’ve got 8 bazillion dollars and full access to the natural DD breasts that are attached to those dollars. Live the life Eric.
Isn’t that Britney’s ex?
Finally, his experience helping guide ships through the Panama Canal paid off for Eric.
Somebody buys her bras at DEB.
“Yeah, I know she’s pretty dumb, but check out those tits, man.”
Somewhere there is a window missing its curtains.
“First I wanna see the Eiffel Tower and then get something exotic Italian food. I know… chimichangas!”
“She’s got nice tits. She’s got nice tits.She’s got nice tits.She’s got nice tits.”
Ehh, four years down…
At least he didn’t have to carry the skin bag made out of her last assistant.
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Jessica Simpson and Eric Johnson in Capri, Italy. (October 16, 2013) -Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN