“Jude, have you shagged your nanny lately?
You have haven’t you?

That’s what you get for asking them a math question.

Those are odd looking electric chairs.

What are her eyes are saying? That his d*ck’s been about three inches away from her eyes.

”But she caught me on the counter (It wasn’t me)
Saw me banging on the sofa (It wasn’t me)”

if they got married she would only need to change one letter of her last name.

It’s rare to see a woman with the “I’m gonna fuck him!” look on her face.

“I know it was you who farted”